Unempowered

[Dekolen]

As you know God, while I was young and still good, much like Job, you let the Devil have at it with me. Now I'm pushing 60, and it hasn't yet stopped. Did you forget about me? A lifetime of stagnation, loneliness, broken dreams, supernatural blocks. Going from one min wage job to the next since high school living paycheck to paycheck never able to save. I am back to being unemployed and now my rent got raised 25 percent. To ad insult to injury, now my health is waning. Severe exhaustion and brain fog make it difficult for me to get through the day without taking multiple naps. Truth be told, Lord, you never empowered or equip me for this life. You were a carpenter, right? If you hire a carpenter to build a shed he can't do it without a hammer, saw. He needs tools to do the job. He needs wood. You can't demand a man win an Olympic race after you chop off his legs. Throw in the supernatural blocks, brain fog, and overwhelming exhaustion and I can do nothing. I'm useless. I'm in a hellacious limbo. Remember when you cursed the fig tree because it had no fruit? In order for the tree to have fruit it needs good soil, needs to be watered and have access to sunlight. That's on you, God. Don't you dare curse me for having no fruit when I breath my last breath because it's on record I prayed to you for fruit, skills, talent, energy, open doors yet all I've received are supernatural curses and blocks. No wife, no friends, no fruit, no joy. This life has been a bust. The Bible says God is a just God. Is it just to expect juice from a raisin? In the end, anyone with fruit, including your great apostles and prophets, were gifted the ability BY YOU lest they boast, right? If you leave me in this limbo I will surely perish. I need you to act now before it's too late and I lose all faith in your promises and goodness. I can't hang on anymore. I'm losing my grip. Which puts my soul in jeopardy because, even though I don't want to, I'm about to lose my faith in you. I know, if the God of the Bible were real, he would have answered me. He would have reassured me. He would have gotten me out of this hole long ago. --Michael N

Heavenly Father you said you would never leave us or forsake us, make yourself real to this your faithful servant. Let him know your mercy and goodness, Renew his spirit and his strength Lord, by your will. Amen