Anonymous
Beloved of All
Holy One, I am making a journey again to Your truth on behalf of myself, and on behalf of others through music. I thank You God, because recently I sold my first record - a blessing I asked You for and Lord Jesus, You answered my request. I am sorry I am such an awful sinner - it is clear to me that I have a long way to go in life in order to be a more godly man. I ask for Your understanding along the way as I bear many old wounds that still bleed - pains that have not healed on account of my own rebelliousness, and the remaining parts of my life that still need to be renewed completely. I confess these things to You silently in shame, knowing that You have power to redeem men from both small sins and big sins.
God, that is why I started writing music for You to begin with - because I fall short of the holy measure of Jesus Christ, as do we all - and I wanted something to work toward every day that involved my heart, and Your word, and my love for You Jesus Christ, - even that love that sustains me every day, - the love that keeps me well looked after by You Jesus.
You've given me many gifts, Jesus Christ - and to You belongs the praise and adoration Lord, and although I am imperfect in either of these - I praise You here and now Jesus Christ. God, You are wonderful, beautiful, merciful, bountiful, generous, all powerful, and pure. You have been so good to me - so good that I do not know what I can do in life to possibly show my affection for You Jesus Christ. I love You, Lord - You are my best friend, my true friend, my only friend who has been faithful through even the darkest of times - and although You are my Lord, and I am Your servant, I still know You are also my friend, Jesus.
Jesus, I need some things made clear to me. Experiences I had long ago - I have been thinking about them more lately - and I wonder regarding them. I post this here anonymously because I know that the answer is coming quickly - and it is best if I don't make known who I am among this community when I ask questions about these experiences.
Jesus Christ, - I remember a day I was at a particular venue, - and there appeared a man there wearing an all blue garment, like the kind that is hand-woven - and the appearance of this garment was very beautiful, and clean - the kind of clean that couldn't come from the labor of hand-washing, or a machine, - but its color was pure, and he also wore a white garment over one shoulder.
When I saw this man, I was very moved in my spirit, because the man appeared to me the same way the Lord Jesus sometimes comes to me in prayers - but this man walked among those at this venue, as if just another man - and although his dress was unique, no one took notice of him but myself. His manner was very gentle, - and love radiated out from him - and when I saw that he went to sit in a separate area a little way off, I felt moved in my spirit, and I sang a hymn loud enough for him to hear, but not so as to make him uncomfortable - because I did not know but suspected that the Lord might be visiting me this day.
This was during a brief dark period in my life, and there was a lot of turmoil - and I had spent a lot of time praying, and I needed God desperately on that day - because I felt as if the whole foundation of my life was being torn out from under my feet. So I stood on the rock of God, and knew that I could take comfort there - because no one but Jesus had power to move me from the rock.
I sang the hymn, and he was sitting a little ways off, and there was a woman who was with him who was dressed as a bride would be dressed - in a gown that was all white and very fine. Again, although their dress was unique, no one took notice of them but myself. At the hymn, the man who was dressed in the blue frock-type ceremonial looking garment came over to me, and he introduced the woman to me. - Again, I did not know if this man was the holy visitation, or if he was just a man - but I felt moved in my spirit, and I thought to myself that this surely was Jesus, my Lord, because love radiated out from him - and to look at him, I felt that love in me. I said to him that they looked like they loved one another, - and a smile touched his face which was very pure, and he looked at the woman with pure happiness and love, and said something like: 'We do?' - and I said that yes, they did.
He introduced me to her, and said her name was Noel. - Later, when I was in a dark and strange place, as an aside, only a few days later I met someone important to me named Noel.
I remember when I first saw the man, I took very clear notice of him after he had entered the venue. - And he coughed twice, - but I heard in my spirit that he was not coughing as it was because he was sick, but he was coughing because I should quit smoking.
Later, Jesus, I was walking around the venue, as it was a smaller type of a place, and there was a girl there who had come to the show who was disabled - she was handicapped so that I could tell her mind didn't work the same as everyone elses, - but when I saw her I recognized her because we had met another time, when I was giving an interview - and she had been in the waiting room at the interview. - And when I saw her at the venue, I went and found a small blue boa type neck-thing, the type that ladies wear, and I put it around her - and she smiled brightly, and said that she felt like a VIP. And I told her that she was.
And when I looked behind me, the man in the blue garment was there. And I had saw that some feathers had fallen to the floor, - they were also blue, - and I handed the man in the garment the feathers, and I said: Birds of a feather - and as if knowing exactly what I meant, and why I said it, he said to me: Flock together, - and he took them in his hand.
Later, Jesus, on this same day at the venue, something that was also strange happened. A performer went on the stage, and I went to sit to listen to him - even though I had just had this very rattling and strange, moving experience with the man in the blue garment - I listened to this performer, because he was a younger performer, and I felt he needed encouragement and that he deserved my audience - because as much as this performer was the younger of either me or him, he was also a more experienced performing artist. And I sat and I listened to him, but as I listened I looked around a little, and I saw that the man in the blue garment had done something very strange. In between where the performer was, and where I was sitting, behind my chair there was another row of seats, and then a small median-type wall - the kind that would divide a space without going totally from the floor to the ceiling.
And I had looked and saw that the man in the blue ceremonial type garment turned his chair so that it was the reverse direction of mine - which faced at a side-angle to the stage, - he had turned it so that it faced the wall completely - and he seemed to be doing something with his hands, and speaking as well - but there was in front of him only this median wall, - and it looked as if he had something very bright in his right hand - the kind of brightness that seemed almost unearthly - not like a flashlight, - but bright like the kind of light I have never seen since then - almost like moonlight or starlight.
And he was making gestures, - but immediately I felt as if I shouldn't be looking at what he was doing, and I turned around and continued to watch the performer on the stage.
Later, it seemed as if this man in the blue had left the venue - maybe being there about the space of two hours. I had introduced myself to him at some point - but he did not give his name to me, though I felt in my Spirit this was the visitation of the Lord Jesus, - and I pray to You now Lord Jesus, and I ask: did I have a visitation from You, God?
When I went to perform on the stage that day, I saw that there was a small dish there, near where I was performing - because the owner of the venue or the manager there had a dog. - And in the dog's dish there was water - but there was also a small red grape. - I took notice of this, because I had seen earlier there wasn't a grape in that dish - and I feel as if the man in the blue garment put this grape there - as I had written a song about grapes in a holy context earlier that year or the year previous - and it was an important one for me to write. - It came to me then the verse about not giving your holy things to the dogs - though I still do not understand the experience.
God, - I relay this story here not in an effort to communicate anything but the need for clarity regarding this event in my life - I want to know: the man that visited me, was he Your Son Jesus Christ? I felt very moved by this man in my spirit, - but I do not want to assume about You Jesus what I do not know to be true totally, because I do not desire to offend You anymore than I already do day to day in my sins.
God, - I also ask that You guide me in my music, and that You allow me to write another record starting in June - and working through till however long it takes. I pray that You bless me so that I may have a career as a musician - and that I may be an equal in my marriage to the one that You have given me to marry. God please hear my prayer in Jesus Christ's name, and bring clarity, forgiveness, and blessings with miracles into my life, because I believe in You Lord, and my labors are for You Jesus. Amen in Jesus Christs name.
God, that is why I started writing music for You to begin with - because I fall short of the holy measure of Jesus Christ, as do we all - and I wanted something to work toward every day that involved my heart, and Your word, and my love for You Jesus Christ, - even that love that sustains me every day, - the love that keeps me well looked after by You Jesus.
You've given me many gifts, Jesus Christ - and to You belongs the praise and adoration Lord, and although I am imperfect in either of these - I praise You here and now Jesus Christ. God, You are wonderful, beautiful, merciful, bountiful, generous, all powerful, and pure. You have been so good to me - so good that I do not know what I can do in life to possibly show my affection for You Jesus Christ. I love You, Lord - You are my best friend, my true friend, my only friend who has been faithful through even the darkest of times - and although You are my Lord, and I am Your servant, I still know You are also my friend, Jesus.
Jesus, I need some things made clear to me. Experiences I had long ago - I have been thinking about them more lately - and I wonder regarding them. I post this here anonymously because I know that the answer is coming quickly - and it is best if I don't make known who I am among this community when I ask questions about these experiences.
Jesus Christ, - I remember a day I was at a particular venue, - and there appeared a man there wearing an all blue garment, like the kind that is hand-woven - and the appearance of this garment was very beautiful, and clean - the kind of clean that couldn't come from the labor of hand-washing, or a machine, - but its color was pure, and he also wore a white garment over one shoulder.
When I saw this man, I was very moved in my spirit, because the man appeared to me the same way the Lord Jesus sometimes comes to me in prayers - but this man walked among those at this venue, as if just another man - and although his dress was unique, no one took notice of him but myself. His manner was very gentle, - and love radiated out from him - and when I saw that he went to sit in a separate area a little way off, I felt moved in my spirit, and I sang a hymn loud enough for him to hear, but not so as to make him uncomfortable - because I did not know but suspected that the Lord might be visiting me this day.
This was during a brief dark period in my life, and there was a lot of turmoil - and I had spent a lot of time praying, and I needed God desperately on that day - because I felt as if the whole foundation of my life was being torn out from under my feet. So I stood on the rock of God, and knew that I could take comfort there - because no one but Jesus had power to move me from the rock.
I sang the hymn, and he was sitting a little ways off, and there was a woman who was with him who was dressed as a bride would be dressed - in a gown that was all white and very fine. Again, although their dress was unique, no one took notice of them but myself. At the hymn, the man who was dressed in the blue frock-type ceremonial looking garment came over to me, and he introduced the woman to me. - Again, I did not know if this man was the holy visitation, or if he was just a man - but I felt moved in my spirit, and I thought to myself that this surely was Jesus, my Lord, because love radiated out from him - and to look at him, I felt that love in me. I said to him that they looked like they loved one another, - and a smile touched his face which was very pure, and he looked at the woman with pure happiness and love, and said something like: 'We do?' - and I said that yes, they did.
He introduced me to her, and said her name was Noel. - Later, when I was in a dark and strange place, as an aside, only a few days later I met someone important to me named Noel.
I remember when I first saw the man, I took very clear notice of him after he had entered the venue. - And he coughed twice, - but I heard in my spirit that he was not coughing as it was because he was sick, but he was coughing because I should quit smoking.
Later, Jesus, I was walking around the venue, as it was a smaller type of a place, and there was a girl there who had come to the show who was disabled - she was handicapped so that I could tell her mind didn't work the same as everyone elses, - but when I saw her I recognized her because we had met another time, when I was giving an interview - and she had been in the waiting room at the interview. - And when I saw her at the venue, I went and found a small blue boa type neck-thing, the type that ladies wear, and I put it around her - and she smiled brightly, and said that she felt like a VIP. And I told her that she was.
And when I looked behind me, the man in the blue garment was there. And I had saw that some feathers had fallen to the floor, - they were also blue, - and I handed the man in the garment the feathers, and I said: Birds of a feather - and as if knowing exactly what I meant, and why I said it, he said to me: Flock together, - and he took them in his hand.
Later, Jesus, on this same day at the venue, something that was also strange happened. A performer went on the stage, and I went to sit to listen to him - even though I had just had this very rattling and strange, moving experience with the man in the blue garment - I listened to this performer, because he was a younger performer, and I felt he needed encouragement and that he deserved my audience - because as much as this performer was the younger of either me or him, he was also a more experienced performing artist. And I sat and I listened to him, but as I listened I looked around a little, and I saw that the man in the blue garment had done something very strange. In between where the performer was, and where I was sitting, behind my chair there was another row of seats, and then a small median-type wall - the kind that would divide a space without going totally from the floor to the ceiling.
And I had looked and saw that the man in the blue ceremonial type garment turned his chair so that it was the reverse direction of mine - which faced at a side-angle to the stage, - he had turned it so that it faced the wall completely - and he seemed to be doing something with his hands, and speaking as well - but there was in front of him only this median wall, - and it looked as if he had something very bright in his right hand - the kind of brightness that seemed almost unearthly - not like a flashlight, - but bright like the kind of light I have never seen since then - almost like moonlight or starlight.
And he was making gestures, - but immediately I felt as if I shouldn't be looking at what he was doing, and I turned around and continued to watch the performer on the stage.
Later, it seemed as if this man in the blue had left the venue - maybe being there about the space of two hours. I had introduced myself to him at some point - but he did not give his name to me, though I felt in my Spirit this was the visitation of the Lord Jesus, - and I pray to You now Lord Jesus, and I ask: did I have a visitation from You, God?
When I went to perform on the stage that day, I saw that there was a small dish there, near where I was performing - because the owner of the venue or the manager there had a dog. - And in the dog's dish there was water - but there was also a small red grape. - I took notice of this, because I had seen earlier there wasn't a grape in that dish - and I feel as if the man in the blue garment put this grape there - as I had written a song about grapes in a holy context earlier that year or the year previous - and it was an important one for me to write. - It came to me then the verse about not giving your holy things to the dogs - though I still do not understand the experience.
God, - I relay this story here not in an effort to communicate anything but the need for clarity regarding this event in my life - I want to know: the man that visited me, was he Your Son Jesus Christ? I felt very moved by this man in my spirit, - but I do not want to assume about You Jesus what I do not know to be true totally, because I do not desire to offend You anymore than I already do day to day in my sins.
God, - I also ask that You guide me in my music, and that You allow me to write another record starting in June - and working through till however long it takes. I pray that You bless me so that I may have a career as a musician - and that I may be an equal in my marriage to the one that You have given me to marry. God please hear my prayer in Jesus Christ's name, and bring clarity, forgiveness, and blessings with miracles into my life, because I believe in You Lord, and my labors are for You Jesus. Amen in Jesus Christs name.