hi Bonnie.....sorry abt all ur problems...appears satan is having a time with u....i assure u however that Jesus is the answer to all ur problems.....i have been exactly where u r...alone run down house...unable to do repairs due to lack of skills and monies....both my parents with the Lord now...brother and sister who won't even acknowledge i exist...i do have children though...as for ur house and all get out of it...thats wht i did...sell it or just walk away from it..whichever.....rent an apartment...no yard to keep up and when anything goes wrong the owner sends a maintenace man to fix the problem..if u cant afford an apartment by urself...find a room mate or two..that is wht i did and now i have extra money in my wallet each month...have replaced all old and worn out belongings with new ones...was able to get false teeth 2 pairs of glasses...high dollar new bed ...computer...desk...high dollar new washer and dryer.automobile....moved from east tx to corpus christi tx near the beaches...weather is great here...these r all blessings because the Holy Spirit told me i needed to form a close and loving relationship with Jesus my God and my creator and thats what i did...and the Lord never ceases to rain down His blessings upon me each and every day...read ur bible daily not just once or twice a week...even 30 minutes a day..get to know Jesus pray for the Holy Spirit to pray for ur needs and for ur reltionship with Jesus and when Jesus sees u r longing to have a relationship with Him...He will open up the Heavens and shower u with everything u need and desire and ur lonliness will be a thing of the past..Jesus will enter into ur heart and He has promised to never leave nor forsake those whom He loves ....those who love Him....also be sure and give Him thanks each and everyday for everything He does for u...down to the very breaths u take as u by His will...continue to remain a living breathing being on this planet we have been blessed to live on..if u will follow these instructions..i can promise u ur life will change and u will be rewarded with a seat at the Marriage feast in Heaven a seat with ur name on it that no other can occupy....u r special to Jesus u know.....if u were the only person ever to exist...Jesus would had still gone to that cross and suffered and died for u and u alone...thats how much He loves u and wants to bless u...i join u in prayer and i pray it is God's will for u to become His child...i pray He will meet all ur needs and that He will lovingly except u into His family...remember too...He does things in His time not ours so be patient and be strong in ur faith...i will look forward to giving u a great big hug one day in Heaven as we will spend forever loving worshiping and praising or almighty...loving and amazing Lord Jesus Christ ijna