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I’m sorry you’re facing tremendous amount of discouragement and disappointment in your life, friend. While you may probably not feel it right now, God loves you and is able to carry you through whatever struggles you’re facing. Please don’t give up, okay? Sending prayers for you, asking the Lord to draw you closer to Himself and fill you with new hope and strength as you look to Him. I strongly encourage you to seek out a person nearby who you can share your feelings and thoughts with -- perhaps your doctor, pastor, or another caring professional. Hang in there, friend!I want to kill myself,curse the world I'm desperate and I need money God is deaf