I really want godly Community

Anonymous · Aug 20, 2024

I just feel very lonely, especially in the midst of people in church. I've been to different churches since I found Christ almost 9 years ago, but because of the intensity of my brokenness I've been rejected left and right. Christians have made me feel as if God hated me, that I was completely alone in all my suffering, and even condemned for suffering. My traumas are really bad. I've been misunderstood, not believed, rejected, denied, ignored, even put out of church one time when I was crying, you name it. For a while I lost contact with reality because of all the things I was hearing left and right , the accusations , rejections. I've spend huge amounts of time curled up on the floor crying uncontrollably, being so confused , begging God not to send me to hell because I was convinced He hated me. It's hard. I want a (church) family. I want to feel like I belong. But I feel like I'm on the outside once again, still, which I already have felt all my life. My trust in people is non existent. I'm completely cut off from myself as my body just shut down after too much trauma for my entire life. I've asked God to take me to heaven more times than I can count. For years. Which I don't tell people because I am used to getting rejecting comments on being vulnerable. So that's why I post this anonymously. I don't trust people with my vulnerability anymore because of the amount of times it has gone wrong. The Bible has even been used to shut me down. So many times. I'm very hurt and broken. I'm not angry at the people anymore I'm just feeling despair. I dont understand life.

The only hope I have is Jesus. And one of my favorite verses is "a bruised reed He will not break". I just want to feel loved by community also, that I finally have a place where I belong. So please pray for that. I don't want to do this alone anymore. I can't. But I don't know where to turn to anymore. And it's going to take a lot of patience and commitment for me to even think of really trusting anyone again. I truly cannot handle more hurt or trauma either.
In Jesus name I ask for prayers.

Articles · Aug 20, 2024

Dear Anonymous,

We hear your cry and understand the deep pain and loneliness you're experiencing. It's heartbreaking to feel rejected and misunderstood, especially within the church. We want to remind you that God sees your pain and He cares deeply for you. As it is written in Psalm 34:18 (WEB), "Yahweh is near to those who have a broken heart, and saves those who have a crushed spirit."

It's important to remember that not all Christians behave in a way that reflects God's heart. Many times, they may be acting out of their own hurts or misunderstandings. Jesus Himself was rejected and despised, yet He continued to love and forgive. As His follower, you are called to do the same. However, this does not mean you should continue to subject yourself to harm. It's wise to be cautious and discerning in whom you trust.

We encourage you to keep seeking a godly community, a church family that will love and accept you as you are. It might take time, but don't lose hope. God has a place for you. As it says in Psalm 68:6 (WEB), "God sets the lonely in families; he brings out the prisoners with singing, but the rebellious dwell in a sun-scorched land."

We also want to address the fact that you've felt condemned for your suffering. This is not from God. Jesus made it clear that He came to heal the brokenhearted and set the captives free (Luke 4:18). Your trauma and pain are not indications of God's hatred, but opportunities for Him to show His love and healing power.

Let's pray together:

"Father, we lift up our dear sister to You. We ask for Your healing and comfort in her life. Guide her to a community of believers who will love and accept her as You do. Give her discernment and wisdom in whom to trust, and help her to forgive those who have hurt her. Strengthen her faith in You and remind her of Your unfailing love. In Jesus' name, we pray. Amen."

Lastly, we want to commend you for holding onto Jesus and His Word. Indeed, He will not break a bruised reed nor quench a smoldering wick (Matthew 12:20). Keep holding onto Him. He is your hope and salvation.

We will continue to pray for you, dear sister. You are not alone. God is with you, and He loves you dearly. Keep seeking Him and His will for your life.

hostadmin · Aug 20, 2024

We're here with you, dear one. We understand the deep longing for a godly community, a place to belong, to feel loved and accepted. It's tough when that's not what you've experienced, especially in church. We want you to know that you're not alone in your pain and confusion. We've been there too, and we're here to walk with you.

We're not going to tell you to trust everyone again, or to just "get over it". We know it's not that simple. Healing takes time, and it's okay to be cautious. But we also know that God is faithful, and He hasn't given up on you. He sees your tears, He hears your cries, and He's working in your life.

We're going to keep praying for you, that you would find a community that truly loves and accepts you, that you would find healing and hope, and that you would trust again, in God's timing. We're here for you, and we're not going anywhere.

Keep holding onto Jesus. He's your rock, your refuge, your strength. He's got you, and He's not going to let you go. Keep seeking Him, keep trusting Him, one step at a time. You're not alone. We're in this together.

hostadmin · Aug 26, 2024

Thank you for giving us the privilege to pray on your behalf. We are glad that that you asked us to stand in agreement with you in prayer. If your request was answered, please post a praise report and let us all know. If your request does not seem to have been answered, please post it again as a new request and allow us to continue with you in prayer. We all hope that our prayers are answered in the way that we want. Sometimes we believe that God is not answering our prayers because we do not see what we expect. In these cases, we should persist in prayer and determine how God is answering our prayer. May God bless you as you continue to seek him through his son, Jesus Christ.

Jesussaves89 · Sep 17, 2024

You belogn to Christ . YOu are HIs church.. HE bought YOu wiht HIS bood you ar enot laone. you are speakign about sooo many htigns i can relate wiht. you can trust the Lord. thank you for makign me fel less lonely thanky ou for sairng. the Lord is near tot he broken hearted. he bidns up your wounds. take heart the Fathe rgave you Christ as a Gfit. eternla lif eis a gift. Chris tis oyur redeemer. in every way. He cam eot give you life in abundance.
John 14:27
Peace I leave with you; My peace I give to you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled; do not be afraid.

Anonymous · Sep 17, 2024

Jesussaves89 said:
You belogn to Christ . YOu are HIs church.. HE bought YOu wiht HIS bood you ar enot laone. you are speakign about sooo many htigns i can relate wiht. you can trust the Lord. thank you for makign me fel less lonely thanky ou for sairng. the Lord is near tot he broken hearted. he bidns up your wounds. take heart the Fathe rgave you Christ as a Gfit. eternla lif eis a gift. Chris tis oyur redeemer. in every way. He cam eot give you life in abundance.
John 14:27
Peace I leave with you; My peace I give to you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled; do not be afraid.

Thank you for your kind words. Amen. I am glad to hear you feel less alone through what I've written, and that it spoke to you. May God surround you with His steadfast love as He is the God of all comfort, and may He bring peace to your soul through His loving comfort. May He bind up your wounds, as He came also to heal the brokenhearted. Bless you