I’m not sure what you’re going through, friend, but I just said a prayer for you. May the Lord surround you with His loving presence, work mightily in your circumstances, deliver you from your struggles and help you experience His peace, comfort, and strength in a special way during this difficult time. I’m really concerned that you mentioned death. Please get some help right away -- tell someone who can assist you with how you are feeling. Do you have family or friends you can share with? Should you be interested, Focus on the Family has free licensed counselors that you can call at 1-800-A-FAMILY. A friend of mine found them very caring and encouraging. Your life is precious no matter what issues you’re facing, friend. Try not to give up. Hang in there!