I can't take this chronic physical pain ...

[Maximum Endurance]

Lord Jesus, Thauduth needs rescue and help in many ways. Please provide and love and care for. I am lifting up Thauduth to You Lord help please. In the name of Jesus hear my prayer and help. Amen.

I can't take this chronic physical pain anymore. I lost my appetite months ago. I don't eat. I am down to 120 lbs. I am skin and bones and in pain in bed all day long crying. My son says to grow up. I just want my physical and mental pain to stop. I lost everyone that I loved last year. I have no one to help me. The only person in my life is my 18 year old son & he tells me to grow up and stop faking. I am dying a slow painful death and no one cares. He used to care about me. But ever since I started getting sicker and weaker and everyone else has passed away, I am left alone with my son who says he should just leave cause I am just a pain and I don't care anymore. I do care. I cry out to God. He tells me If he was gonna help me he would of by now. I have been going down hill for the past 2 years. No doctor cares. No doctor does anything. I had a nurse I talked to on the phone just tell me to do what I do best, which is lay in bed and wait to die. I can't take this anymore. I can't exist like this. I need help. I don't have any friends to call. I tried calling a friendship line, only to be left on hold for over an hour. No one cares. I feel like I would be better off dead, cause then my son could live his life without having to watch me slowly die. He thinks I am faking this and says I am looking for attention. I have been reaching out of medical help for over 2 years. I have been praying. I am so scared. I can barely breathe right now. My pain never stops. I can't take this anymore. I don't know what to do anymore. I am existing and have nothing to hang on to anymore. I am a pathetic loser that has no one left but a son that dosen't need me anymore. And he could leave at any moment. I need a freind so bad right now to help me take a shower. I need to feel hunger and thirst again. Dear Lord Jesus Help Me! I can't go on like this. I am in pain 24/7, exhausted, weak and have no energy left in me to fight. I feel so alone. I would be in a nursing home if anyone knew how bad I have become. I am so weak I haven't been able to shower in a few weeks. I don't feel good. I find out if I have cancer at the end of this month IF I live that long. I lay in bed and my son says I am pathetic and yells at me. I can't even do simple things anymore. I call crisis lines and they tell me to go check myself into the hospital for mental health help. I can't even walk very well without a walker now. I am 57 alone and dying. I feel 90. I am scared and have no one to talk to. If I talk to my son he tells me to grow up. I can't take this anymore. Jesus please come back soon! I haven't been out of this apt. for so long. No one knows I exist. I hate myself and the existing that I do in bed. I can't cope anymore. What is left? Some one PLEASE help me! No one can hear me. No one knows me. Who would want to know me now for as weak as my body has become. I can't take this anymore. I can't take this anymore. prayer lines tell me that Jesus can heal me. I have been calling them, but i stopped after they asked me for money. I have no one to talk to. I lay in my bed with ice on my neck and heat on my arm. My skin is hanging on my bones. I am nauseated 24/7. I can't even get the strength up to take a shower anymore. I don't have a bath tub. My hair is falling out. Am I gonna die soon? If I do, only my son will know, and he won't even know what to do. I am losing any form of normal thinking it has been so long. I feel helpless! I am scared! I have lost hope. Please God Help Me! I can't take this anymore! I need a miracle! I need someone to hug me and tell me everything is gonna be ok. Some one to sit with me in my room and talk to me. Not just have my son yell at me telling me to grow up and act like an adult. I hurt all over and no doctor has helped me. I can't even think straight anymore My son says I make excuses, and that is why doctors won't help me. He don't understand. God help me I want my life back. I want someone to love me and take care of me. I can't do this anymore. I am sorry this is so long. Venting is all I can do anymore. Besides crying. I don't feel well. I have been going from doctor to doctor for over 2 years and only getting worse. I don't know what to do anymore. I can't even take care of my basic needs anymore. My body is shutting down. I am scared!! I feel sick all the time. I shake all the time, because of the pain. I am not ok and God knows this. Why am I still here suffering like this? Will I ever get better? Or am I just gonna not be one of these days? God help me PLEASE!!!