Anonymous
Beloved of All
Young Father of 2 boys who’s in a time of need. Somehow ended up lost. Carry the feeling of shame, guilt, temptation driven myself so deep that the load sometimes feels to heavy to live with. I want to be a better son, father, brother, friend, MAN. Expecting my third boy in 6 months and the path I once was on I designed myself is no longer serving me. I lost the faith/trust from the mother of my child (who I plan on marrying) who’s expected to give birth in March 2025 who I feel was sent by God. She’s everything I prayed for. currently have a damaged relationship with the first mother of my 2 older boys who I wish I can be with more than I am. I’m scared to go down that same path. Everything I love tends to crumble. I want a better relationship with my mother/father. I want to heal from trauma I’ve never faced as a child. I want to rid myself of bad habits that doesn’t serve me. I’ve made a choice to join the army to give me a sense of purpose. With the timing of everything this kind of sacrifice seems to be detrimental to my girlfriend who’s due in 6 months but my intentions is only to become a better character. I need God to light a path for me. Assuring I’m no longer making decisions emotionally and out of anxiety. Since the lost of my brother last month I seen myself spiraling in the wrong direction. I have to much to live for but at the same time feel like it’s too much at times. I just want to be better. Be a role model for my kids. Some one they can be proud to call Dad. I want to regain that confidence I once possessed. Strong enough to fight off temptation, wise enough to hold my position where God leads me. I want to develop a better relationship with God. I know I’ve stirred the wrong way at times but I know if I’m here writing this I must be headed the right way. Please pray for my family