Today I have selected a devotional that I believe will remind you to pray for your beloved husband or wife who is a prodigal as we approach Holy Week and Resurrection Sunday. - Charlyne
What Are All Holidays Like
For My Prodigal?
In short, holidays are horrible out in the far country of life. Everything we see, hear, or do is a reminder of what life was like before our home was attacked by Satan.
We prodigals attempt to deal with holidays in one of three ways. The most painful is to attempt to replicate our family’s traditions in our own miserable surroundings. Secondly, we may attempt to totally ignore the holidays. For prodigals where the enemy has planted another person into the picture, the prodigals may attempt to join in on his/her family’s holiday traditions. If you are a stander, rejoice when that happens. Rejoice? Yes, praise God that is taking place. Let me explain.
Our youngest son, Tom, and his wife, Kathleen, married several years ago, near Easter. Their Easter plans that first year picked up on both Steinkamp family and Hektor family traditions, yet they were unique to Tom and Kathleen. By their second Easter, they had even more traditions.
We have a treadmill in our home. The manufacturer placed a warning on it telling of the danger of stepping onto the machine when it is already moving, because given enough speed, the treadmill can flip the user. Tom and Kathleen are starting their treadmill of traditions. By the time their children are old enough to remember, there will be another generation of Steinkamp family traditions in place.
After I became a prodigal, I attempted to step onto the treadmill of traditions of another woman and her children. That family’s treadmill had been running for years and was going full speed, and it almost flipped me.
Have you ever noticed an adult in church for the first time in their life? They are uncomfortable as they attempt to do what everyone else is doing, without knowing the reason. That is what I was doing and I can promise you that is what your prodigal is experiencing at the family gatherings of that other person as well.
When the other woman’s extended family would gather, I was treated politely, but nevertheless as an outsider. I did not know the incidents they were talking about. I barely knew the people there, much less the grandmothers they spoke about.
If you want to see a dance called “The Prodigal Wiggle,†let Uncle what’s-his-name start loudly telling old anecdotes about the other person’s spouse! The prodigal knows that family’s treadmill of tradition is about to flip them when good old Uncle finishes his story with, “I sure miss him/her not being here,†and the prodigal is certain every set of eyes in the room is on them, silently wondering, “Why are you here? This is our family.†I never attended an “other person†function that I did not feel totally out of place.
I left every holiday gathering in the far country nursing my wounds, after being flipped by another family’s treadmill of tradition. The salt in my wounds was hearing my children innocently report on “holiday as usual†at home, as Charlyne worked alone to carry on our family traditions. That, my friend, is one of those times when the Holy Spirit is quietly saying, “Why don’t you stop this foolishness and go home to your family?â€
We prodigals think we are made of tough stuff and dismiss that urging, thinking the next far country treadmill trip will be different. The process is repeated over and over until finally we are beat up enough to go home.
After 20 plus years of marriage ministry, I understand how standing spouses hurt on holidays. Above all else, I have heard my wife share the hurts I caused her during our time of divorce.
If you will ask the Holy Spirit to give you a glimpse of how your prodigal is also hurting, your holidays will become one of prayer, as my wife has been suggesting recently. Do not waste this day on the computer listening to how bad someone else has it, but spend your day off “laboring†in prayer for your prodigal spouse. Today, you can ask God what you should do, not a bunch of strangers.
Do you realize how many journeys toward home are started on the many different holidays? For most prodigals, being flipped by the treadmill of tradition softens the heart. Yes, we have Thanksgiving, Christmas and the New Year holidays, but did you know that more people go to church on Easter than on Christmas? Do you know how many prodigal men, women and children will be in an Easter service this year? I was there without Charlyne. Are you praying and fasting for your spouse and all prodigals to have the Holy Spirit touch and change their hearts during Holy week or on Resurrection Sunday?
You need to pray that every man of God will present the Gospel as God plants the urge for your husband or wife to be asked to go to church by the other person, neighbors or people at work or you may feel the Holy Spirit encouraging you to ask them to go to a church service near or on Easter. Always seek God’s will and way as you pray for His directions.
The question is not what so-and-so “says†to do or not to do, but is a matter of what God is clearly telling you to do. Above all else, keep your family’s treadmill of tradition operating at a speed where your prodigal is able to jump right back on, when God leads them.
Dear friends, do not believe every spirit, but test the spirits to see whether they are from God, because many false prophets have gone out into the world. This is how you can recognize the Spirit of God: Every spirit that acknowledges that Jesus Christ has come in the flesh is from God, but every spirit that does not acknowledge Jesus is not from God. This is the spirit of the antichrist, which you have heard is coming and even now is already in the world. 1 John 4:1-3
Because He lives,
Bob Steinkamp
Rejoice Marriage Ministries, Inc.
What Are All Holidays Like
For My Prodigal?
In short, holidays are horrible out in the far country of life. Everything we see, hear, or do is a reminder of what life was like before our home was attacked by Satan.
We prodigals attempt to deal with holidays in one of three ways. The most painful is to attempt to replicate our family’s traditions in our own miserable surroundings. Secondly, we may attempt to totally ignore the holidays. For prodigals where the enemy has planted another person into the picture, the prodigals may attempt to join in on his/her family’s holiday traditions. If you are a stander, rejoice when that happens. Rejoice? Yes, praise God that is taking place. Let me explain.
Our youngest son, Tom, and his wife, Kathleen, married several years ago, near Easter. Their Easter plans that first year picked up on both Steinkamp family and Hektor family traditions, yet they were unique to Tom and Kathleen. By their second Easter, they had even more traditions.
We have a treadmill in our home. The manufacturer placed a warning on it telling of the danger of stepping onto the machine when it is already moving, because given enough speed, the treadmill can flip the user. Tom and Kathleen are starting their treadmill of traditions. By the time their children are old enough to remember, there will be another generation of Steinkamp family traditions in place.
After I became a prodigal, I attempted to step onto the treadmill of traditions of another woman and her children. That family’s treadmill had been running for years and was going full speed, and it almost flipped me.
Have you ever noticed an adult in church for the first time in their life? They are uncomfortable as they attempt to do what everyone else is doing, without knowing the reason. That is what I was doing and I can promise you that is what your prodigal is experiencing at the family gatherings of that other person as well.
When the other woman’s extended family would gather, I was treated politely, but nevertheless as an outsider. I did not know the incidents they were talking about. I barely knew the people there, much less the grandmothers they spoke about.
If you want to see a dance called “The Prodigal Wiggle,†let Uncle what’s-his-name start loudly telling old anecdotes about the other person’s spouse! The prodigal knows that family’s treadmill of tradition is about to flip them when good old Uncle finishes his story with, “I sure miss him/her not being here,†and the prodigal is certain every set of eyes in the room is on them, silently wondering, “Why are you here? This is our family.†I never attended an “other person†function that I did not feel totally out of place.
I left every holiday gathering in the far country nursing my wounds, after being flipped by another family’s treadmill of tradition. The salt in my wounds was hearing my children innocently report on “holiday as usual†at home, as Charlyne worked alone to carry on our family traditions. That, my friend, is one of those times when the Holy Spirit is quietly saying, “Why don’t you stop this foolishness and go home to your family?â€
We prodigals think we are made of tough stuff and dismiss that urging, thinking the next far country treadmill trip will be different. The process is repeated over and over until finally we are beat up enough to go home.
After 20 plus years of marriage ministry, I understand how standing spouses hurt on holidays. Above all else, I have heard my wife share the hurts I caused her during our time of divorce.
If you will ask the Holy Spirit to give you a glimpse of how your prodigal is also hurting, your holidays will become one of prayer, as my wife has been suggesting recently. Do not waste this day on the computer listening to how bad someone else has it, but spend your day off “laboring†in prayer for your prodigal spouse. Today, you can ask God what you should do, not a bunch of strangers.
Do you realize how many journeys toward home are started on the many different holidays? For most prodigals, being flipped by the treadmill of tradition softens the heart. Yes, we have Thanksgiving, Christmas and the New Year holidays, but did you know that more people go to church on Easter than on Christmas? Do you know how many prodigal men, women and children will be in an Easter service this year? I was there without Charlyne. Are you praying and fasting for your spouse and all prodigals to have the Holy Spirit touch and change their hearts during Holy week or on Resurrection Sunday?
You need to pray that every man of God will present the Gospel as God plants the urge for your husband or wife to be asked to go to church by the other person, neighbors or people at work or you may feel the Holy Spirit encouraging you to ask them to go to a church service near or on Easter. Always seek God’s will and way as you pray for His directions.
The question is not what so-and-so “says†to do or not to do, but is a matter of what God is clearly telling you to do. Above all else, keep your family’s treadmill of tradition operating at a speed where your prodigal is able to jump right back on, when God leads them.
Dear friends, do not believe every spirit, but test the spirits to see whether they are from God, because many false prophets have gone out into the world. This is how you can recognize the Spirit of God: Every spirit that acknowledges that Jesus Christ has come in the flesh is from God, but every spirit that does not acknowledge Jesus is not from God. This is the spirit of the antichrist, which you have heard is coming and even now is already in the world. 1 John 4:1-3
Because He lives,
Bob Steinkamp
Rejoice Marriage Ministries, Inc.
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