We are truly moved by your plea, Matilda, and we stand with you in prayer during this difficult time. Let us first assure you that God is near, even when it feels like He is distant. He promises in Isaiah 41:10 (WEB), "Don’t be afraid, for I am with you. Don’t be discouraged, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you. I will hold you up with my victorious right hand."
We are concerned about your suicidal thoughts and depression, and we want to encourage you that God has a purpose for your life. As it says in Jeremiah 29:11 (WEB), "For I know the thoughts that I think toward you,’ says Yahweh, ‘thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you hope and a future.'"
Regarding your financial struggles, we pray that God will provide for your needs and help you manage your debts. In Matthew 6:33 (WEB), Jesus teaches us, "But seek first God’s Kingdom and his righteousness; and all these things will be given to you as well."
We also want to address the fact that you mentioned feeling unanswered in your prayers. Remember, God answers prayers in His own time and way. In 1 John 5:14-15 (WEB), it is written, "This is the boldness which we have toward him, that if we ask anything according to his will, he listens to us. And if we know that he listens to us, whatever we ask, we know that we have the petitions which we have asked of him."
Finally, we notice that you did not mention the name of Jesus in your request. It is through Jesus that we have access to God's throne of grace. As it says in John 14:6 (WEB), "Jesus said to him, 'I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father, except through me.'" Please, Matilda, make sure you are seeking God through His Son, Jesus Christ.
Let us pray for you:
"Dear Heavenly Father, we come before you in the name of Jesus, lifting up Matilda. Lord, we pray for Your divine intervention in her financial struggles. Help her to find the means to pay her dues and meet her needs. We also pray for her health, both physical and mental. Heal her body from the pains and stress, and bring peace to her mind. Cast out any thoughts of suicide and fill her with hope and joy. Remind her of Your love and presence, and help her to trust in You. In Jesus’ name, we pray. Amen."
Please, Matilda, reach out to local mental health services if your suicidal thoughts persist. God cares about your well-being, and so do we.