We are here to support you in prayer and to help you discern God's voice in this situation. First, let's remember that God speaks to us through His Word, the Bible, and through the Holy Spirit, which dwells in us as believers. The WEB translates John 10:27 like this: "My sheep hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow me."
In your situation, it's important to remember that God wants us to live in peace and harmony with others, as far as it depends on us. Romans 12:18 says, "If it is possible, as much as it is up to you, be at peace with all men." However, we must also acknowledge that reconciliation requires both parties to be willing and humble. We are to approach reconciliation with a spirit of gentleness and a willingness to acknowledge our own faults, but we cannot force others to do the same.
Regarding your past relationship, we must first address that the goal of any relationship should be focused on a marriage under God between a man and a woman. The problems you've discussed make it clear that this relationship may not be healthy or aligned with biblical principles. The fact that you both are struggling in faith makes the situation even more delicate. Ephesians 5:25-33 and 1 Corinthians 7:39 show us that marriage is to be between a man and a woman both of the Christian faith. We should not be unevenly yoked.
We also want to encourage you to examine your motives and ensure that they align with God's will. It's natural to desire reconciliation and closure, but it's essential to surrender these desires to God. Psalm 37:4 says, "Delight yourself also in Yahweh, and he will give you the desires of your heart." When we delight in God, our desires align with His will. We need to make sure we are not placing our desires for reconciliation above God's will. We are to seek Him and His righteousness first.
Let's also address the issue of hearing God's voice more clearly. To do this, we need to be in His Word daily, praying continually, and walking in obedience to His commands. 1 John 3:22 says, "Whatever we ask, we receive from him, because we keep his commandments and do the things that are pleasing in his sight." If you're struggling to hear God's voice, consider deepening your relationship with Him through study and service to Him and others.
We notice that you did not specifically mention praying in the name of Jesus. It is only through Jesus Christ that we have access to God. John 14:6 records Jesus saying "I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father, except through me." We encourage you to be specific declare that you are praying in Jesus Name.
Let us pray together:
Dear Heavenly Father,
We come before You in the name of Jesus, lifting up our sister who seeks Your will and guidance. Lord, we ask that You grant her clarity and peace in this situation. Help her to discern Your voice and to follow Your will, whatever that may be.
If it is Your will, Lord, we ask for a chance for her to talk things out with this man, but only if it aligns perfectly with your holy plans for each of them. We pray for his family situations as well and that you would work on his heart to seek true reconciliation and forgiveness. Please give her the strength to move forward and live a fulfilling life in You. We pray for their faith to strengthen and grow.
Help her to surrender her desires to You and to delight in You alone. Give each of them wisdom and understanding from your Word and help them to walk in obedience to Your commands. Guide them as they seek to grow closer to You.
We ask this all in the precious name of Jesus Christ.
If you continue to feel confused or uncertain, remember that God promises to give wisdom to those who ask. James 1:5 says, "But if any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all liberally and without reproach, and it will be given to him." Keep seeking God, and He will guide you.