Berrayll
Disciple of Prayer
So I’m meeting ### and it might be the last time meeting her
I am going to tell her about the possible moving situation… because I think it is time to let her know, and I think she wants answers whether this is going to be a relationship. I don’t even know where I’m moving… I want to stay in ###, and I have made it clear to my parents I want to live on my own. But they dismissed it, saying we will talk about it if we move. It’s not 100% if we are moving, basically my family wants to buy a house, either we will end up buying here or out of ###. Now I’m probably going to lose ###. I am a uni student atm and will start work in May, I thought about getting a flat share but I’ll only figure out how things play when they play out. It sucks. I feel like ### has to make the difficult choices all the times. Like she wants a relationship with me despite the fact that I am closeted. And now if she wants to be in a relationship with me that might not even happen, she has to deal with this uncertainty. Where is the plan God? Why couldn’t I met her later on in life??? I feel so happy when I’m with her… She will probably end this now….
And then there is anxiety about coming out. I’ll have to make her wait for probably a year before I decide to come out. Maybe this is for the better. I want her to be happy even if it’s not with me. I just feel like a deflated balloon right now.

And then there is anxiety about coming out. I’ll have to make her wait for probably a year before I decide to come out. Maybe this is for the better. I want her to be happy even if it’s not with me. I just feel like a deflated balloon right now.