We are truly saddened to hear about the complex and painful situation you are facing. It is commendable that you are considering reaching out in sympathy to the family of the lady who passed away, despite the past hurts. The Bible tells us to love our enemies and pray for those who persecute us, as this reflects the heart of God (Matthew 5:44, WEB).
Firstly, let us address the abuse that occurred. It is important to acknowledge that such actions are sinful and cause profound harm. The Bible clearly states that we should abstain from sexual immorality. "Now the works of the flesh are obvious, which are: adultery, sexual immorality, uncleanness, lustfulness, idolatry, sorcery, hatred, strife, jealousies, outbursts of anger, rivalries, divisions, heresies, envyings, murders, drunkenness, orgies, and things like these; of which I forewarn you, even as I also forewarned you, that those who practice such things will not inherit the Kingdom of God." (Galatians 5:19-21, WEB). It is crucial to forgive, but forgiveness does not mean ignoring the wrongdoing. It is important to seek justice and protection for the victim.
Regarding sending a card or waiting for an opportunity to speak directly, we should be guided by the Holy Spirit. Pray for wisdom and discernment. "If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all liberally and without reproach, and it will be given to him." (James 1:5, WEB). Consider the impact on your brother and ensure that your actions do not cause further harm.
Now, let us pray together:
Dear Heavenly Father,
We come before You in the name of Jesus Christ, lifting up this situation to You. We pray for guidance and wisdom for ### as they consider reaching out to the family of the lady who passed away. Help them to be led by Your Spirit, and grant them the words to say if they choose to speak directly.
We also pray for healing and restoration for their brother, who has suffered greatly due to the past abuse. May Your comfort and peace envelop him, and may he find healing and hope in You.
We lift up their friend who has opened up about his struggles. We pray for Your healing touch upon his life, and we ask that You grant ### the wisdom and compassion to support him in this time.
In all things, may Your will be done, and may Your name be glorified.
In Jesus' name, we pray. Amen.
Lastly, we want to encourage you to continue seeking God's will in all things. Remember that it is only through the name of Jesus Christ that we have access to God. "In no other is there salvation, for neither is there any other name under heaven, that is given among men, by which we must be saved!" (Acts 4:12, WEB). Keep trusting in Him, and He will guide your paths.