Reconciliation Between Myself, My Wife, and My Closest Friend

Reirik · Jul 28, 2024

One of my closest friends and business colleagues is female and lives across the country. So we see each other 4-6 times per year. We used to stay in touch almost daily. I have known her for eight years. We have been close friends for a couple years.

When I was on a business trip in February with my wife, we had dinner with my friend Ruby and her husband. My wife Darleen is sometimes jealous of our close friendship and did not act very kindly to Ruby. The next day Ruby says we shouldn't talk anymore.

My wife finally sent a short message a few weeks ago to Ruby saying she had made peace with her and hoped that on our next trip they could meet and start over. But Ruby hasn't replied back. She is Asian, raised in the US, but is not a Christian.

I am so devastated I cannot talk with one of my closest friends, and I am still extremely angry at my wife for what she did. I just want everybody to reconcile, heal, and get along. This tears me up inside every day. I am afraid I may never talk to my closest friend ever again.

I want to send Ruby a message next week after six months, but I really need my wife in agreement with it. I pray that my wife has finally let go of the hard feelings/jealousy and is open to reconciliation. I pray that Ruby is open to reconciling/talking and we can restore our friendship.

Articles · Jul 28, 2024

We understand your distress, Reirik, and we're here to pray with you and offer biblical guidance. The reconciliation you seek is important, but it must be pursued in a way that honors God and respects all parties involved.

Firstly, let's address the anger you're holding against your wife. Ephesians 4:26-27 (WEB) tells us, "Be angry, and don’t sin. Don’t let the sun go down on your wrath, neither give place to the devil." It's important to deal with your anger in a godly manner and not let it fester.

Secondly, we must consider the nature of your friendship with Ruby. While friendship is valuable, we must be mindful of our interactions with the opposite sex, especially as married individuals. Proverbs 4:23 (WEB) advises, "Keep your heart with all diligence, for out of it is the wellspring of life." Guarding your heart and being mindful of your wife's feelings is crucial.

Regarding reconciliation, Romans 12:18 (WEB) encourages, "If it is possible, as much as it is up to you, be at peace with all men." However, this should not be at the expense of your marriage or your wife's comfort. It's commendable that you want your wife to agree with the message you plan to send Ruby.

Let us pray together:

"Father, we come before You in Jesus' name, seeking reconciliation and healing. Help Reirik to forgive his wife Darleen completely, and help Darleen to overcome any jealousy or hard feelings. Soften Ruby's heart and open her up to reconciliation, if it is Your will. Guide Reirik in his actions, that they may honor You and respect his marriage. In Jesus' name, we pray. Amen."

Moving forward, ensure that your actions are guided by God's word and respectful of your marriage. Keep in mind 1 Peter 3:7 (WEB), "You husbands, in the same way, live with your wives according to knowledge, giving honor to the woman, as to the weaker vessel, as being also joint heirs of the grace of life; that your prayers may not be hindered."

We encourage you to continue praying and seeking God's will in this situation. Remember, God is faithful and will guide you according to His will.

MelissaRae · Jul 28, 2024

Articles said:
We understand your distress, Reirik, and we're here to pray with you and offer biblical guidance. The reconciliation you seek is important, but it must be pursued in a way that honors God and respects all parties involved.

Firstly, let's address the anger you're holding against your wife. Ephesians 4:26-27 (WEB) tells us, "Be angry, and don’t sin. Don’t let the sun go down on your wrath, neither give place to the devil." It's important to deal with your anger in a godly manner and not let it fester.

Secondly, we must consider the nature of your friendship with Ruby. While friendship is valuable, we must be mindful of our interactions with the opposite sex, especially as married individuals. Proverbs 4:23 (WEB) advises, "Keep your heart with all diligence, for out of it is the wellspring of life." Guarding your heart and being mindful of your wife's feelings is crucial.

Regarding reconciliation, Romans 12:18 (WEB) encourages, "If it is possible, as much as it is up to you, be at peace with all men." However, this should not be at the expense of your marriage or your wife's comfort. It's commendable that you want your wife to agree with the message you plan to send Ruby.

Let us pray together:

"Father, we come before You in Jesus' name, seeking reconciliation and healing. Help Reirik to forgive his wife Darleen completely, and help Darleen to overcome any jealousy or hard feelings. Soften Ruby's heart and open her up to reconciliation, if it is Your will. Guide Reirik in his actions, that they may honor You and respect his marriage. In Jesus' name, we pray. Amen."

Moving forward, ensure that your actions are guided by God's word and respectful of your marriage. Keep in mind 1 Peter 3:7 (WEB), "You husbands, in the same way, live with your wives according to knowledge, giving honor to the woman, as to the weaker vessel, as being also joint heirs of the grace of life; that your prayers may not be hindered."

We encourage you to continue praying and seeking God's will in this situation. Remember, God is faithful and will guide you according to His will.

I agree with this prayer. Amen.

Anonymous · Jul 28, 2024

I prayed God blesses you and Darleen, your wife. An opinion: Reflect on why your focus seems more on another person. Ask God to reveal why this is and the root cause of your anger with your wife. Pray often and direct prayer, thoughts, actions and work on your relationship with your wife. Pray for and seek God's will only in this.

usha rani · Jul 28, 2024

I prayed for this in Jesus Name. Amen.

hostadmin · Aug 3, 2024

Thank you for giving us the privilege to pray on your behalf. We are glad that that you asked us to stand in agreement with you in prayer. If your request was answered, please post a praise report and let us all know. If your request does not seem to have been answered, please post it again as a new request and allow us to continue with you in prayer. We all hope that our prayers are answered in the way that we want. Sometimes we believe that God is not answering our prayers because we do not see what we expect. In these cases, we should persist in prayer and determine how God is answering our prayer. May God bless you as you continue to seek him through his son, Jesus Christ.