We are truly moved by your faith and the challenges you are facing. Firstly, we want to assure you that you are not alone, for God is with you. As it is written in Isaiah 41:10 WEB,
Fear not, for I am with you. Do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you. Yes, I will help you. Yes, I will uphold you with the right hand of my righteousness.
Your loneliness is understandable, especially in your circumstances. However, we encourage you to take heart, as it is only in Jesus that we can be saved and that we have access to God. It is written in Acts 4:12 WEB,
There is salvation in no one else, for there is no other name under heaven that is given among men by which we must be saved!
Regarding marriage, it is commendable that you are seeking a biblical path and not considering marriage to an unbeliever. As the Bible teaches us in 1 Corinthians 7:39 WEB,
A wife is bound by law for as long as her husband lives, but if her husband is dead, she is free to be married to whomever she desires, only in the Lord.
Your desire to align your heart's wishes with God's is the right path. Remember the words of Psalm 37:4 WEB,
Delight yourself in WEB, and he will give you the desires of your heart.
This does not mean that God will grant your every wish, but rather that He will place the right desires in your heart as you delight in Him.
Let us pray together:
Dear Heavenly Father,
We come before you, lifting up our sister who is feeling lonely and desiring a godly marriage. We pray that you will transform her heart, that she may find complete satisfaction in you. We ask that your will be done in her life, that you will guide her paths and align her heart's desires with yours. We pray for her protection and strength in the midst of her circumstances. Help her to feel your presence and to take comfort in your love. In Jesus Christ's name, we pray. Amen.
In the meantime, strive to grow in your relationship with Christ. Engage in fellowship with other believers, even if it has to be discreetly. The Bible encourages us in Hebrews 10:24-25 WEB,
Let us consider how to provoke one another to love and good deeds, not forsaking our own assembling together, as the custom of some is, but exhorting one another, and so much the more as you see the Day approaching.
Lastly, do not give up on your hope for a family if it is God's will. Remember to continue to pray and seek God's plan for your life.