We are truly heartbroken to hear about the multitude of challenges you're facing, Urwenn, but we are glad you've taken the courageous step to reach out for prayer and support. We are here to intercede on your behalf and to provide biblical guidance and encouragement.
Firstly, we want to acknowledge your struggles with employment, self-esteem, and anxiety. It's important to remember that our value is not determined by our employment status or achievements, but by the fact that we are created in God's image. As it is written in Genesis 1:27, "God created man in his own image. In God's image he created him; male and female he created them." Also, 1 Peter 5:7 reminds us we should cast our anxieties on Him, because He cares for us.
Regarding your relationship, we need to address this from a biblical perspective. The Bible teaches us to flee sexual immorality, have self-control and to keep the marriage bed pure. It is important that you both are believers with the goal of marriage. We are to pursue relationships that align with biblical principles. The goal of an alliance between a man and woman should be with a goal towards marriage. You mentioned that you are struggling with pornography. It is important to address this immoral behavior because it can cause further damage to the relationship you have with your girlfriend and future wife. Pornography will also hinder your relationship with God. Please read and pray about 1 Corinthians 6:18, "Flee sexual immorality. Every sin that a man does is outside the body, but he who commits sexual immorality sins against his own body." Also Ephesians 5:3-5, "But sexual immorality, and all uncleanness, or covetousness, let it not even be mentioned among you, as becomes saints; nor filthiness, nor foolish talking, nor jesting, which are not appropriate; but rather giving of thanks. Know this for sure, that no sexually immoral person, nor unclean person, nor covetous man, who is an idolater, has any inheritance in the Kingdom of Christ and God." Once you decide you would like to pursue a marriage, then we recommend to read 1st Corinthians chapter 7 for further guidance. It is important to note that fornication, adultery, and all other sexual sins are forgivable when you confess, repent, and ask for forgiveness. But, just because they are forgiveable does not mean you will not face the consequences of these sins. Finally do not be deceived. It says clearly in the Bible meaning of the words, the examples in the Bible, and the consequences of the sins discussed here.
We are concerned about your mental health struggles and thoughts of self-harm. It's crucial to seek professional help immediately if you haven't already. Remember God's promise in Philippians 4:6-7, "In nothing be anxious, but in everything, by prayer and petition with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your thoughts in Christ Jesus."
Regarding your spiritual disconnect, it is essential to understand that watching sermons is great but it is no substitute for Bible Study. It is good to hear what others say about the word of God in a sermon. But, it is important to study the Bible yourself, too. The Bible says that in the last days many false teachers will come. Some will even twist the Bible to make it say what they want it to say. I also remind you what the Bible says 2nd John 1:9-11. Your prayer should always have two parts. First, confess your sins and repent from them and ask for forgiveness. The second part is to ask anything that is on your heart. It is only by the name of Jesus Christ that we can enter the presence of God. Remeber the gift of the Holy Spirit to help guide you to Jesus when you ask. Jesus says in John 14:6, I am the way the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father, but by me. This is why it is so important to believe in Jesus and always use his name when we pray.
Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives. He who seeks finds. To him who knocks it will be opened.
Addressing other issues, while the Bible encourages us to follow outlined principles, we must also acknowledge and address its stance on pornography addiction. Viewing pornography is a sin of sexual immorality. It is best to confess this sin, ask for forgivness, repent, and ask God to help you to remove yourself from any temptation to watch pornography.
Let's pray together:
Lord God, we lift up our dear Urwenn to you. Father, you know the struggles and challenges they are facing. Lord God we ask, in the name of Jesus Christ, that you guide our dear Urwenn to the right resources for employment and that they find a good job here in the UK. Lord God, please intervene also and help remove our dear Urwenn from any temptation or thought of self-harm. We are reminded by your word in 1 Corinthians 10:13, that you are faithful and will not let them be tempted beyond what they can bear, but along with the temptation, provide them a way of escape. Most importantly. we ask all this in the name of Jesus Christ.
We are also reminded by your word in Isaiah 41:10 "Don't be afraid, for I am with you. Don't be discouraged, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you. I will hold you up with my victorious right hand."
Finally, it is important to pursue courtship with the goal of marriage, a Christian marriage, where both believe in Jesus Christ and the Bible. It is important to remember the fruits of the spirit in Galatians 5:22-23. The fruits of the spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. Against such there is no law. If you love your boyfriend or girlfriend by the definition in 1st Corinthians 13 then you are less likely do something or say something that you think could lead to a future divorce. The Bible says to treat your spouse, as you would want them to treat you. Be selfless, instead of selfish but only if you are are also being treated the same. The Bible believes in a loving God, with loving discipline.
So it is the same learning to love your boyfriend or girlfriend, spouse, husband, or wife. No matter what context you are in, we are to act in love.
So Urwenn, we appreciate your openness and honesty. Let us remind you that in the Bible we find how to live with our heavenly Father forever, when we are physically dead. Please let us know how our prayers are working in your life with the Holy Spirit. Please also let us know how we can pray more specifically for you. It is only in the name of Jesus Christ, that we have access to go to God and be saved.
We also encourage you to re-engage with a local Bible-believing church community for support and fellowship with other believers. We encourage an open confession to your pastor or a fellow believer. This is important because the Bible says that we cannot see sin in ourselves. To not forsake the fellowship of other believers will help to keep us from being deceived about our sin.
Remember, our prayers are a sweet fragrance to God through Jesus Christ (Revelation 5:8).
God bless you Urwenn, In the name of Jesus Christ our Lord and Savior and soon returning King.