Besman
Disciple of Prayer
Prayer for weight loss. I have been abuse physically, emotionally and verbally by my husband and his morher. My kiddos are not allowed to come by the house because my mother in law tells my husband I don’t want her coming to my house. I don’t have anything against her. I use to be open to her until I see her true colors. And I stop being open to her I use to ask her to go places with me but she would tell my husband my friends and I made her the eyeball which is a lie. I try to include her in everything I don but she either have an excuse not to go or tell my husband a lie so I stop. To me it’s not healthy. Now everyday I’m at war with my husband because my mother in law is okay with my husband beating me up in front of her. And she pretends to talk to me as if it is funny. So yes I shutdown, my husband calls me fat and lazy and stupid all of the above, tells me he wasted his time raising my kids and that he made me who I am today but I know GOD made me who I am today. I’m successful in my career because of GOD, I’m Smartt because of GOD. My body is so heavy my bones could barely support my weight I begged your mercy and prayers to help me get back in shape, I signed up for a gym my husband and mother in laws thinks I’m just wasting money at the gym because I don’t want to save money for the renovation of our house so my mother in law can move in quick. I gave up my master bedroom for my mother in law but it still not good enough. She goes to church every Sunday and read her Bible but she wants my husband to control me the way she wants and wants me to buy her expensive things. Now I just stop mentioning anything about my mother in law or even call or text her. I figured take myself out the equation so I don’t get abused but I was wrong she still finds a way to get my husband to yell curse and almost hit me tonight. So I also shut down in talking to my husband like I use to before. I don’t say anything to him any mor how his day went how my day went. Or hold his hand like I use to, cook for him I stop. Every food I cooked he complaints I cannot cook or do anything right. He won’t eat the food I make but yet yells at me so the entire neighborhood can hear it. So I really don’t know what to do. I use to love coming home after work but now I dread coming home. I hate coming home. I won’t cheat at all I just want peace, everytime my husband gets angry it’s because my mother in law said something. So I just bite my tongue take the abuse and pray so hard quietly that God keep peace and love in my heart while I bite down on my teeth so hard, and pray he stops but who am I. Im just a fat, lazy, ugly, stupid wife that wants his money so he says. Since I took a career with a pay cut, now that my husband makes more money than me, he tells me he pays everything. That his the one making all the money. So I just keep quiet, he just tells me to stuff my fat mouth with food. Please pray for me to strengthen me and change my eating habits, heal my body. I feel like my entire body is inflame, and pray that I don’t grave to buy junk food or waste money on dumb things please. I know one of these days my husband will beat me senseless. I just want to be in shape and be happy within myself I don’t care about getting abuse I can endure that. Been through it over 22 years. I will ensure any abuse my husband give me because of his mom or what he wants I just please ask for prayers to help me get in the best shape there is please. Thank you Jesus and I hope to get a higher paying job soon. I know when it is Gods time for me to get that job it is Gods time so I’m not worry about their. I just really want to loose weight. I am currently 250 pounds. Have a lot of injuries. Two ACL surgery, ectopic surgery, back and neck injuries and both hip shifted from car accidents that weren’t my fault. I just want to be light thank you and God bless