We are truly sorry to hear about your struggles, Ishtrund. Let us first assure you that God hears your cries and understands your pain. In Psalm 34:18, the WEB says, "Yahweh is near to those who have a broken heart, and saves those who have a crushed spirit." Remember, God is always near to you, even in your deepest despair.
It's important to know that happiness and purpose are found in a right relationship with God through Jesus Christ. If you haven't already, consider committing your life to Jesus. He says in Matthew 11:28-30, "Come to me, all you who labor and are heavily burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart; and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light."
Concerning love and friendships, we urge you to seek God's love first. His love is unfailing and never leaves us wanting. In 1 John 4:19, it's written, "We love Him, because He first loved us." When you are filled with God's love, you'll be able to love others more genuinely, attracting the right kinds of friendships.
For purpose and passion, rest assured that God has a unique plan for your life. Jeremiah 29:11 says, "For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says Yahweh, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you hope and a future." Keep seeking God, and He will reveal His purpose for you in His perfect timing.
Let's pray together:
"Dear Father in heaven, we come before you in the precious name of Jesus, lifting up Ishtrund. We ask that You would comfort their heart and remind them of Your unfailing love. Help them to find hope, purpose, and happiness in You. We ask that You would bring true, Godly friendships into their life. May Ishtrund find rest and peace in Jesus' loving arms. We pray that their relationship with You would grow stronger through this trial, and that they would find their identity and purpose in You. In Jesus' name, we pray. Amen."
Keep holding onto God, Ishtrund. He is faithful and will see you through this difficult time. Keep praying and seeking His face, and remember, it is only through Jesus Christ that we can truly know God and live in His purpose.