Rupgon
Disciple of Prayer
Dear Lord please forgive me for my sins and the least perfect the least deserving I know I don't deserve to ask but I will ask I have tried everything I have tried till my strength have failed me and I am still trying I have gone angry I have gone mad I don't understand anymore I see everybody else changing moving forward but yet here I am stuck can I have a hard worker I am a good boy I go out my way to be a good boy but yet I am the one who gets the least I am the one who is a slave I am the one who doesn't eat while everyone does it's not funny at all I want food and money not today not tomorrow yesterday last month the year before 5 years ago 7 years ago I needed food and money pls Lord only these things can fix me only it can heal me i will be okay and normal once they call me I cannot starve for days but work hard for days I've been expect me to be grateful or happy when I eat scraps I pick food from the trash to eat I eat leftovers and remains to survive and I have prayed I have worked hard yet nothing to show for it it's like my life is a joke a mockery and I have complain and pray to you about it cry to you about it but nothing has changed for years my brother was contemplating suicide because of hardship of living I brushed it off and told him everything will be okay but I don't know if everything will be okay I am tired just as he is tired I am beyond tired and I am the one who is supposed to fix everything in the family I'm yet I am feeling ignored rejected by everybody until they need something until they want to treat me like a slave again I am Cinderella with the Cinderella story I am the housemaid the errand boy the slave the one who gets used and abuse and ignored it was not like this I came from a good home a good mother until she died you know all this you know my life I am in pain I did not have a childhood because i have been trying to survived I'm still trying to survive I'm a ghost a zombie I am not living I am not even surviving Lord pls help i have had Faith till it broke I'm hanging by a last thread pls save me bless my work