Disciples of Jesus
Disciple of Prayer
Pray for those suffering from a "Victim Mentality!" VICTIM MENTALITY by Dennis King ISBN to be awarded Copyright 2021 Dennis King License Thank you for respecting the work of this author. This work is licensed for your personal enjoyment. Any and all information herein may be used in Christian Bible Studies without seeking additional permissions. A mention to this link where some of my other works can be found would be much appreciated. Dennis King Disclaimer This a Biblical-based instruction. If some living persons are mentioned, their information would come from public sources. Some modern-day characters are pure fiction. Acknowledgments I wish to thank the unnamed others for their assistance with this epistle and my other writings. Author's Notes Every American should honor all servicemen and women whether or not you agree with the political decisions that keep them on the front lines risking their very life and limbs. God help us, it is the everyday heroic actions of these men and women that allow us the many freedoms most American citizens take for granted. Please honor these brave men and women. Support them and their families through www.woundedwarriorproject.org. Table of Contents Victim Mentality Books by this Author Christian Writings Stories For Children Toss, The Christian's Card Deck Author's Introduction If you are looking for a biblical scholar to defend every single word, line, or message of the modern-day bible, perhaps my Christian writings are not for you. I am a lay-person with no theological degrees whatsoever. However, with years of experience as a North American Mission Board Chaplain, I have studied and led Christian ministries in prisons, senior facilities, rehab centers, and Bible Study groups. My religious writings have been viewed in more than a dozen countries over 55,000 times.* I mention this not out of pride but to encourage you to write from your heart and publish through SermonCentral or SmashWords at their respective dot com sites. Everyone goes to heaven for judgment. The question is, will you be allowed to stay there? Even if you are already a devout and practicing Christian, this short epistle could help you explain Christianity to those having questions. God commands us to “go forth and make disciples of all nations.” *USA, India, Nigeria, Philippines, Ghana, Canada, Singapore, Great Britain, Northern Ireland, Germany, Kenya, Malaysia, Switzerland, Trinidad, and Tobago ~{ }~ Victim Mentality Believe it or not, “Victim Mentality” can be an inherited, instilled or self-learned personality trait. People frequently perceive themselves as victims of the negative actions of others in the past, present, or even in their fear of the future. This “scapegoat” or “I’m the injured party” mindset is often derived from a self-defeating, illogical thought process. Yet, in some cases, some people have in fact been the victims of wrongdoing by others or have otherwise suffered misfortune through no fault of their own. However, such misfortune does not necessarily imply that one has to respond by developing a pervasive, all-inclusive attitude where one frequently or constantly pictures them self to be the victim. Most such victims behave as if everything is truly the fault of someone else or some dark and foreboding external consideration. You are the victim only to the greatest extent that your mind will accept. By irrationally rationalizing many people, unfortunately, sense they are unfairly, unduly persecuted in every state of affairs almost daily. The victimized mindset will have you dancing with the devil, then complain that it isn’t your fault. Oh, but these victims have a chorus of ready-made responses. I grew up dirt poor. My parents were too strict. My parents never cared. My parents didn’t love me. My parents smothered me. I had no parents, Granny raised me. Dad was never home. Dad was too strict. Mom let me get away with everything. Mom was an alcoholic, Dad a Druggie. I had too many sisters and brothers. All I had were hand-me-downs. They always hold persons like me down. I’m too old. I’m too young. I’m too dumb. I’m smarter than everyone else. Why isn’t life fair? My all-time favorite is don’t blame me––it was the Devil’s doings! And so on and so forth. Notice how some excuses are the exact opposites of others. You’ve heard most of these. Maybe you’ve even uttered a few of these excuses from time to time. As stated previously, sometimes victims may have been the unfortunate target of wrongdoings committed by others or had otherwise suffered some travesty or tragedy through no fault of their own. Whether those responses are real or just convenient excuses, deciding to make a positive change is the only way to subdue and even vanquish all feelings of inferiority. We’re not always going to understand why bad things happen. Yes, things like being passed over for promotion or, even worse, not getting the job in the first place is unfortunate. Being too fat or not having a striking appearance is disheartening. Being hassled by others for no particular reason is certainly not pleasant. But remember, you’re only a victim to the degree of what your perception accepts. Giving free rein to a ‘woe is me mentality,’ or ‘look what I suffered!’ or ‘why did this happen to me’ will not only pull you down, it’s likely to keep you down. The Bible never promises we can reach our destinations without trials, tribulations, or without heartfelt disappointments. Nor are we guaranteed to understand the circumstances and conditions we have to live through. Life is not fair. Life is not equal for all, life has never been! Life will never be equal for all! Not even when we get to heaven. Followers of Christ need to step up and rise above their difficulties. God doesn’t allow suffering unless He has a purpose for it. Not to be trite, but the expression “no pain––no gain is often true. As an example: An inspiring number of inmates personally acknowledge that going to prison was “the best thing that ever happened.” There they encountered Christ for the very first time. For many inmates, when visited by prison ministry folks, it was the first time they ever experienced genuine, unconditional love from anyone. We may not understand the destinations and purpose of our lives at any given moment, but isn’t that what faith is about? We all know life is not a game––but sometimes we can use games as a life-lessons. Imagine, if you will, that you won last year’s Wimbledon Tennis Championship. This year you again have battled your way to the final match. There is only one player that could prevent you from capturing the title again. The winning score of the last match is on the line. With what could be the last serve needed, your tennis racket rockets your best shot over the net and in bounds, but the opponent smacks it right back. A bird flying overhead causes your eyes to flicker for a split second as you anticipated the ball’s direction and tried to hustle over to return it. However, the ball bounces just out of your reach. Your reaction was a tad too slow. You lose! Can you blame the bird? Can you demand a ‘do-over’? Can you blame the other player for your loss? No. Shifting our example to football, when the Dallas Cowboys, playing in a windy Green Bay snowstorm, have a pass intercepted. Do they blame the home team? At game’s end, do they complain about the snow, the playing field or weather conditions? Be honest! Yes, they sometimes do! But if they do that, what do you think their chances of improving are? Did their complaints change the game’s outcome? With a victim’s mentality, the players won’t try to improve because in their minds it wasn’t their fault. If it wasn’t their fault, then there is no need to improve their passing and receiving skills, is there? Friends, it is the same with your life. Be willing to evaluate yourself in every situation. Placing the blame on others, whether or not justifiable, places you smack-dab in the clutches of a Victim’s Mentality. If you think it is not your problem, then you won’t attempt the improvements necessary to rise above those particular circumstances. Let’s review Romans Chapter 8 for a bit. But when you hear the word ‘flesh’ think of the mind as the mind is the controlling component of our overall flesh. I’ll begin with verse nine. “You, however, are not in the realm of the flesh but are in the realm of the Spirit, if indeed the Spirit of God lives in you. And if anyone does not have the Spirit of Christ, they do not belong to Christ. But if Christ is in you, then even though your body is subject to death because of sin, the Spirit gives life because of righteousness. And if the Spirit of him who raised Jesus from the dead is living in you, he who raised Christ from the dead will also give life to your mortal bodies because of his Spirit who lives in you. Therefore, brothers and sisters, we have an obligation—but it is not to the flesh, to live according to it. For if you live according to the flesh, you will die; but if by the Spirit you put to death the misdeeds of the body, you will live.” Don’t let your mind control you to accept less than your best. Don’t accept self-induced negative assessments that are bad for you! Problems must be recognized and acknowledged before we can correct them. Now let’s move on to some accompanying verses. “For those who are led by the Spirit of God are the children of God. The Spirit you received does not make you slaves, so that you live in fear again; rather, the Spirit you received brought about your adoption to sonship. And by him we cry, “Abba, Father.” The Spirit himself testifies with our spirit that we are God’s children. Now if we are children, (with Christ) then we are heirs of God, if indeed we share in his sufferings in order that we may also share in his glory.” Fears of our mind can enslave us. So whether by our own minds or actual circumstances we endure sufferings, but we must also look forward to our future Glory. In Romans 8, verses 18-21. “I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us. For the creation waits in eager expectation for the children of God to be revealed. For the creation was subjected to frustration, not by its own choice, but by the will of the one who subjected it, in hope that the creation itself will be liberated from its bondage to decay and brought into the freedom and glory of the children of God.” Frustrations, sufferings, bondage, and decay abound! Victims, by definition, are those that have experienced persecution, abuse, or trauma of some sort. They are going through an array of emotions giving thought or excuses to real or imagined, internal and/or external, justifications. As they feel oppressed, they try to wrap their minds around what just happened. Some become unreasonably angry and lash out against anybody or everybody. Their minds often go into a state of crisis and pandemonium. On the other hand, some feel ashamed, betrayed, cheated, fearful, violated, or just to plain weak to persevere. Many times, people even feel ‘frozen’ and incapable of action by their situation. Yet they feel obliged to cast the blame on someone or something else. Why do some folks seem to be content to continue as victims? I believe they find advantages to being labeled as the victim. Their whinings are heard and frequently sympathy is bestowed on them. It may seem strange to us, but sometimes it’s much more comfortable to consider yourself the victim. Some people grow used to feeling sorry for themselves, throwing pity parties, and inviting others to join in. They want us to say, “You poor thing! You really have it tough!” Don’t get me wrong, we all might enjoy a little pity once in a while. Pretending or allowing ourselves to be the victim is soothingly convenient when we don’t want to take the effort to change. We might blame our troubles on our childhood, our alcoholic spouse, our nasty boss, or on a painful illness. After all, in the terrible circumstances we are wallowing in, who can expect us to move ahead in life? Who could expect us to witness for the Lord with all the chains and debris holding us back? Don’t we have every right to wallow in self-pity? Jesus shatters the victim mentality. We’re tempted to think of ourselves as helpless lambs being dragged to the slaughter. But faith in Jesus makes us “more than conquerors through him who loved us.” Nothing, no matter how painful or powerful, should separate us from God’s love in Christ Jesus. As we believe in Christ, we should also accept ourselves. That can make us victorious––no matter what has happened or what we face. When people stop using their personal shortcomings and troubles as excuses, then they can extinguish their problems or better their circumstances. Our love of God can help us transcend the victim mentality. People paralyzed by self-pity need to reflect on how much God loves them. What Christ endured for them! Then they might find that Christ’s greatest blessings far outweigh their self-perceived problems. When you meet and defeat the demons that bind you, you may realize that a victory celebration is more satisfying than a pity party. Through God’s love, you can be the victor. Unfortunately, in the victim’s mind, self-limiting boundaries are often approached with a fearful mindset against becoming responsible. This dreadful mindset often gives rise to terms such as “protect me,” “take care of me,” and “Gimme this or that because of my situation”. Instead, they should use terms of empowerment. Like “I can do it,” “I’ll try harder,” or “I’ll change that myself.” When troubled we should use thoughts, words and deeds that suggest stepping up and using our natural, God-given powers. Isn’t that better than of hiding away our shortcomings or blaming others? To regain proper balance in their life, people have to exercise self-determination and set out to resolve their own personal situations, with God’s help. Setting your prayers before Jesus and religiously studying God’s Word are excellent methods to employ. Give yourself encouragement which will go a long way towards improving your self-sufficiency and achievement. But you might ask, “Is it right and proper to have a ministry of self-encouragement?” God provides the Biblical answers: Proverbs 12:25 “Anxiety weighs down the heart, but a kind word cheers it up.” John 16:33 NIV “I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” John 14:27 NIV “Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.” Philippians. 4:5-7 “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” Of course, there are many other examples speaking to increasing faith and trusting in God. Do that rather than blaming your circumstances and current condition. Are you a victim of your past, your circumstances, your environment, your failures? If so, don’t be! Study them. Be curious to learn how to make improvements. Never hesitate to ask for help, especially from a Christian acquaintance. Turn the reversals of your troubles into reflections of goodness and glory of Jesus. Understand, that while we live in a world that has many unbearable tragedies and overwhelming, unexpected, losses. But hope is a resource that is always at hand. By enduring past loneliness, devastation, and seemingly utter hopelessness, you can subdue any situation. Accept your burdens, suppress your troubles by placing more faith in Jesus. Don’t go it alone! Surrender into the loving arms of Jesus Christ. That is an important message for all people to hear, especially when they need to be victorious over the problems or conditions of their life. And finally, if you see someone anxious, someone struggling with a victim’s mentality––reach out in Christian love, with gentleness and extend a hand up. That’s what God wants you to do. The End Books by this Author Betrayed by Soldiers is a novel of Marines and Army soldiers in wartime Afghanistan. The abilities, grit, and intellectual capabilities of two Recon Marines and a female Army Corporal are pitted against a vast, interwoven network of traitorous Americans, corrupt allies, and foreign spies. Their destinies are thrown together during the clash of a terrorist ambush. At the explosive firefight start, two soldiers are saved and one killed. Of the two saved, one was a dirt-bag and one became a heroine. Later, a cowardly Army Sergeant First Class detonates a terrorist’s suicide vest. The Marine Lieutenant is injured so severely he becomes a double amputee. Even with both feet blown off, the officer struggles through to make a valiant come back. Betrayed by Soldiers|NOOK Book Romantic Poetry is 20,000 words of original poetry delivered in more than 150 poems. Within this volume you'll discover short and lengthy poems mainly about a real romance, decades in the making, and heartfelt feelings captured by nontraditional sonnets. Basically, the first 10,000 words were written to win the love of my sweetheart. Mostly romantic, although some poems are witty, insightful, or downright crazy. Once you have downloaded your copy, please feel free to copy and personalize any poems you wish for your private or romantic use. Romantic Poetry|NOOK Book Deep Cover Shakedown is a stand-alone story but the first squeal to Betrayed by Soldiers. Each novel should appeal to past and present members of the Army, Air Force, Navy, and Marine Corps as well as any reader interested in detective or espionage stories. The lead female, Army Corporal Isabella DuLay is portrayed as intelligent and strong, yet vulnerable, spunky, and lucky. The leading male characters are First Lieutenant Robert Steele and Sergeant Cassius Kelly, both Recon Marines. In this novel, the criminal network is almost stamped out by the dangerous undercover work of Sergeant Kelly, Corporal DuLay. Lieutenant Steele, double amputee, is released from Walter Reed Hospital. Will they and their fledgling Security and Private Investigating firm, BlackSteel survive the hit men dispatched by a foreign government? Can our heroes bust up the networks selling black market explosives and distributing counterfeit bills? Tracking spy's, traitors, and pushy politicians, they not only survive firefights but battle inter-agency turf struggles between the Department of Justice, NSA, and the Pentagon. Being fact-based makes for believable character situations and lures the readers on because they remember wisps of reported events which I pepper with truths they might not know. Deep Cover Shakedown The Soul Searching Robot is an adult to teen, Sci-Fi story of a robot trying to get a soul so it could be saved. An intelligent robot becomes a Christian believer. Though he has faith, he concludes a soul is needed to be saved. He hooks up with an retired Space-tech who pumped plasma through Earth's ozone. It was an exhausting job. A devil induced plague is about to envelop the earth. They must meet & beat Satan with the help of Lady Montague. Who wins? Who dies? Who is shackled in hell for all eternity? You? Hopefully not! US Marketplace Christian Writings Three Important Christian Lessons in this work are; Is Nineveh America's Wake up Call? Free Will, Our Choice, Our Responsibility, and Remove The Roots Of Bitterness. I am a lay-person with no theological degrees whatsoever. However, as a North American Mission Board Chaplain, I have studied and led Christian ministries in prisons, senior facilities, rehab centers, and Bible Study groups. My religious writings have been viewed in more than a dozen countries over 55,000 times; USA, India, Nigeria, Philippines, Ghana, Canada, Singapore, Great Britain, Northern Ireland, Germany, Kenya, Malaysia, Switzerland, Trinidad, and Tobago. I mention this not out of pride but to encourage you to write from your heart and publish through SermonCentral or SmashWords at their respective dot com sites. Spreading God's Word, clarifying Jesus' messages and reaching out to the unsaved are rewarding undertakings. Success or failure, redemption or damnation for all eternity hangs in the balance. The Soulful Robot is similar to the Soul Searching Robot except rated “G” Christian Beliefs Explained in 30 Minutes Grasping basic Bible beliefs need not be unduly complicated. Don't be intimidated if the Bible seems too complex or convoluted to understand or to explain. Among all the books ever written, the Bible is the most remarkable. There is a unity of the overall message despite having forty or so authors writing in three different languages, over roughly 2,000 years. Protestants and Lent? Many Catholics and other orthodox religions look to the time of Lent as traditional activities representing the death of Christ plus His resurrection, and return. Should protestants change habits for Lent? Lent is a religious season when people, worldwide, give up certain foods or habits to demonstrate self-restraint and grow closer to God. For many people lent, is a serious, earnestly religious observance. The purpose of Lenten rituals are to prepare believers for a sincere celebration of Easter by initially placing the mark of Christ on their foreheads, then entering into a season of prayer, penance, mortifying the flesh, repentance of sins, alms giving, and forms of self-denial exhibited by forgoing certain pleasures of foods, treats, or alcoholic spirits. Lent can seem mystifyingly strange to practicing Protestant Christians and non-Christians. Some consider Lent as a time when weird religious “stuff” happens while few understand or can explain the New Testament basis for Lent. Unless you are Anglican, Eastern Orthodox, Oriental Orthodox, Lutheran, Methodist, or Roman Catholic, Lent may be as much as an enigma to you as it is to the unsaved. The unschooled might consider all aspects of Lent nullified like some fanatical pagan rituals removed back in the Middle Ages? Christian Loyalty How can anyone be expected to be loyal and committed to upholding God's Word being ignorant of that Word or barely knows it? Righteousness is what we are to be loyal to. The theme 'There are no moral and spiritual absolutes' is being drummed into us from every angle in the world, for at least two generations! This very claim is an absolute falsehood but people choose to believe in those lies and place their loyalty on the wrong foundations. Stories for Children Tick, Tock, and Tink's Time Machine is about three mice who go back in time and have frolicking adventures. Mainly, this is an 'illustrated flip the pages' story to be read to younger children. Your kids may surprise you by knowing the words attached to the pages drawings. Tick, Tock, and Tink's Second Adventure is about three who built their own time machine and overcome the situations they run into while exploring a jungle in the ancient past. The Strawberry Squirrel is a short story about two adventuresome squirrels. This story was written so a parent or guardian could read a portion to their children right before bedtime. The Flesh-Kincade reading ease is rated at 63.8. The actual, vocalized story telling time allowing for adult and child inter action is approximately fifteen to twenty minutes. Magical Tales of Turtles and Treasure is about kids finding a magic turtle on a beach and go off on magical adventures. This delightful story is centered around a magical turtle and the inquisitive kids. You open the pages to find the distressed loggerhead crying out for help, while stuck upside down in a seashore crevice. Enter our heroes, Dick and Jane, to tug and twist the helpless creature to freedom. But everybody needs to be careful. Mysterious islands are on the horizon. Volcanoes might erupt without notice. Why did a magical turtle need help? Don’t you know, even enchanted turtles can’t perform any magic when they are caught or flipped over on their back? The character names of the two storyboard tykes can be substituted, by you, as you read, with identities or nicknames more meaningful to your children. Satan's Rummage Sale is a modern-day, short story fable suitable for teens and adults. You may contact me directly at Toss@usa.com or HLS@usa.com for comments, criticisms, or suggestions. TOSS CHRISTIAN CARD DECK is an eight-suited set of 'Christian' playing cards. Toss, with its beautiful multi-ethnic face cards, plays all known card games like Spades, Hearts, Pinochle, Spoons, and Old Maid but with more fun and excitement. Besides the 'normal' four suits, the additional suits are the Cross, Angel, Shield, and Castle and their colors are gold and blue, respectively. This Toss Double Deluxe Card Deck is offered only at my personal website. Toss Double Deluxe Card Decks can be ordered from WWW.TOSS.iWARP.COM or for $12 via Pay DISCIPLES of JESUS using PayPal.Me Military men and women can email hls@usa.com for a free 'Short Timer's' Caleandar. About the Author Served in the military, as an enlisted man in the Marines and Army before becoming an officer at the half-way mark. Retired at the Pentagon after twenty years. Currently working as Chaplain visiting Senior Centers and also driving Emergency Response Vehicle for the Red Cross. I also help out with Disaster Assessments and act as a Shelter Supervisor when needed. For more about this author please go to: www.smashwords.com/interview/DennisDKing Contact by email at HLS@USA.com