Splilor
Disciple of Prayer
I need prayer. I need prayer strong and demanding as I heard a special evangelist tell me one time to make prayers come true; you have to be stern and demanding. I've never agreed to this, but maybe this is the answer. My wife is trying to ruin our marriage, manipulating everything into my fault when this isn't my lifestyle. I've always been a believer and I went to church all my childhood, where I was saved at the age of 14 at a church all-night bowling camp rally in ###. My wife has a lot of spiritual needs as she was never taught anything about church or Jesus as a very young child. Her grandmother started going to church, and confused, she has been born again after her 4th marriage. Neither of her parents were very religious. Her father talked about it, but the lifestyle was not there. He claimed to be saved but he was a drunkard, and my Bible says no drunkards would enter into the kingdom of God, which I hope is not true and that he did go to heaven. Her mother never talked about Jesus or church other than being forced to go as a child on a bus to church on Sunday mornings. I really could use a lot of prayer, and so could she, mostly hers is for making her understand the commitment she made to God in our vows, and there are serious consequences in going backwards, which our children up into the 7th of generations could pay for. My wife said she got saved and went through all the motions in 2012 and was baptized with me and our oldest son in 2013. I pray God heals both of our hearts and holds me tightly through all of this, and I pray God works on my wife's heart drastically and immediately because I will be completely honest with you all for praying with me and for us that I do not even want to live without her anymore. She did this very same thing 8 years ago. I almost succeeded in driving my truck down a cliff to end it all 8 years ago, and the last 6 weeks I have contemplated taking my own life every day and every night all night long and all day long. Honestly, if it were not a sin and I wouldn't go to hell for it, I would already be dead to tell you the truth. God says he will never send us anything that we cannot handle, but this I cannot handle, and I beg everyone to pray like you have never prayed before. I meant every single word of my vows and commitment to God and to my wife, every single word, and I will not nor can not go on without her. So please pray, please pray for us hard and long and the most powerful prayer you can ever think of on how to pray to make God fix us and fix this mess that should never happen in a Christian home to begin with. I pray God comes into our home and removes all evil from our homes as our homes are under attack more and more each day. I also pray that our internet would blow up or something so she couldn't sit and talk to people on the internet all day and night when we are posed to be a family, and we are only supposed to congregate between God's people for spiritual reasons. Unsaved people have such a downward spiral on you when you hang out or talk to them for long periods of time, and then things like this start to happen in our Christian homes. It doesn't help anything that there is so much evil on this property where we live; there is only one other family on this property with 8 other families and 2 of the other families I do believe may just be Satan in human form. You know how saying will take up residency in a person's body and ruin others around them until he is done with them and then he will destroy that person for good. Well, I honestly feel as if we are living in ### or ### if I spelled them right; spell check keeps changing them on me. But please pray powerfully and pray like you have never prayed before. I beg you in Jesus' precious and holy name. I do pray. Amen.