Anonymous
Beloved of All
Lord, I grew up with cruelty.
The people around me don’t understand how fragile and broken I am inside.
What mother throws things at her child? Is violent and puts her life in danger? Takes her anger out on them? What family tells you that everyone hates you and wishes you were dead? Chokes and harms you? Mine did.
They made me so lonely and desperate for affection. I could never judge character. The men I chased weren’t good men. They were cruel. They used, abused, and yelled. They made me feel ugly worthless and hurt.
My family may no longer hurt me. Those men are gone. I now have you, Lord, and I am blessedly saved by salvation.
But I can trust no one. I need too much. I’m a clingy emotional mess. I’m a child inside. I’m sure my friends are tired of me leaning on them so much. That I am always sad, suicidal, and struggling. I’m grateful they come from loving homes, but they cannot understand me. They know nothing of the scars I carry.
Lord, I am crying out to you. I am struggling. I feel alien and alone. Like a burden who can’t cope. I am trying my hardest, but it’s so difficult. Those memories haunt me. I just can’t be normal.
Thank you for saving me, and loving me when no one else can. I’m your servant and I wish to follow you. I want to enjoy this new life you’ve given me, so help me, Abba, as I cannot do it alone.
I pray this in Jesus’s precious name, amen.
The people around me don’t understand how fragile and broken I am inside.
What mother throws things at her child? Is violent and puts her life in danger? Takes her anger out on them? What family tells you that everyone hates you and wishes you were dead? Chokes and harms you? Mine did.
They made me so lonely and desperate for affection. I could never judge character. The men I chased weren’t good men. They were cruel. They used, abused, and yelled. They made me feel ugly worthless and hurt.
My family may no longer hurt me. Those men are gone. I now have you, Lord, and I am blessedly saved by salvation.
But I can trust no one. I need too much. I’m a clingy emotional mess. I’m a child inside. I’m sure my friends are tired of me leaning on them so much. That I am always sad, suicidal, and struggling. I’m grateful they come from loving homes, but they cannot understand me. They know nothing of the scars I carry.
Lord, I am crying out to you. I am struggling. I feel alien and alone. Like a burden who can’t cope. I am trying my hardest, but it’s so difficult. Those memories haunt me. I just can’t be normal.
Thank you for saving me, and loving me when no one else can. I’m your servant and I wish to follow you. I want to enjoy this new life you’ve given me, so help me, Abba, as I cannot do it alone.
I pray this in Jesus’s precious name, amen.