Anonymous
Beloved of All
Pleas Pray! This is going to be a very strange prayer request. I grew up in a very Christian house and I always believed in the existence of Jesus. I even thought I got saved at a time and I did get baptized. After a recent very, very serious injuries. I came to a very shocking conclusion. Somehow between addictions, obsessions and distractions. I've never ever really had a true relationship with Jesus. Also I've been guilty of some of the worst sins for over 30 years. I did again confess that Jesus Christ is LORD and believed with my whole heart that God raised him from the Dead. I am trying hard to have a relationship with Jesus.But to be honest most of the Times it feels like he's left me completely. Lots of sin that I have been addicted to for years.The Bible says we'll send you to hell and people are allowed in the Kingdom of Heaven. Bible says that those that were once enlightened can never be called to repentance again. I think I was also guilty of willful sinning and some extremely wicked stuff years back.Can't explain it. It's like my mind took over was no stopping it. I'm convinced I am under the Wrath of God. I don't want to go into details. But over 3 months ago I did a sin that the Bible says deserves death. Well not long after that I got extremely severely injured. My injuries are very very serious!!! So much so that I had to stop my business. My injuries required the most advanced medical treatment in the world which my country don't have. My pain is beyond unbearable!!!!!! I can barely get through a minute. My shoulders, elbows, arms upper and lower back, both thumbs and both knees r o in crazy, crazy pain. I don't have words to express how bad the pain is.My arms and legs are getting weaker every day. Because I can't really use them for anything. Just holding a coffee mug makes my elbow pain. It's really scary if you can't use your arms or legs.My shoulders and elbows and knees are are making crazy loud noises( I don't have arthritis). It's all because of a injury. I'm truly feeling the Wrath of God. I have so much unbearable pain in my body. Feels like I was in 2 car accidents.Pleas, pleas, pleas ask as many Christians as possible on the planet to pray for me. That God will remove his Wrath, well return his mercy, love and grace!!! I need a miracle.Like no one has ever needed for healing of my severe injuries in my (serious cartilage and rotator cuff injuriesis ultra Bad) body It wil take like 6 operations to improve a little. If there's any hope whatsoever. I love Jesus and wants to be obedient now. But how can you make peace with not being able to use your arms or legs and extreme pain that never stops. I'm even getting suicidal thought. I know I deserve this. But I will give away everything I own in a heart beat.Just being able to use my arms again and being painfree and for God to write my name in the book of life. This level of pain and this disability will drive any person on the planet to complete insanity!!! I am deeply and sincerely sorry for everything dear Lord. I confess everything and repent and beg for mercy. This will be a horrible way to die. Total inability to experience joy and excruciating pain. Can't even help my good old parents anymore if I could live my life over knowing what I know now. I would do everything different