switchback
Humble Prayer Warrior
I just finish watching a movie called The Passion Of The Christ. Jesus went through what he went through for Gods will. I felt love for his family watching Jesus go through the trials he went through. Jesus is who he is, he is the son of God but I am who I am, a human being living on this earth. The reason I felt love for his family is because my love ones are going through the same because they love me, they love a man who's heart is full of hurt. I am a type of person who is tormented mentally by something I cannot fight and I am treated unfairly by society because of my past. Having said that there is something inside of me that wants Jesus but I am helpless. Jesus went through what he went through according to his father, but for me I am worthless no matter how much I want Jesus it feels like am cursed or unwanted and not good enough for Christ. If you can only live my life you would know what its like, tormented mentally and mistreated in society, it hurts so much watching my love ones go through this but they are the reason I am here I don't want to leave them because I love them so much. Sometimes I just about to lose it and sometimes I just wish to end this and sometimes I just wish God can take me away and do whatever to me according to what I deserve. I always think Jesus died for me, but I am so tormented mentally maybe because of the conditions I grew up in and I wish for peace for those who really hates me but I don't know how to pray and bring about peace to those against me. And if I am going to be mistreated for the rest of my life I only wish God give me the strength to go through it because normal death is a long ways and it hurts so much. I thank those who encourages me and pray for me and I hope this site is meant to help people around the world because I surely need real help too and there is no where else I can go, if there was another place where I can seek real help I would go I just wish I can find it and in the mean time I am here tormented mentally and emotionally. Jesus if you can help me this is my prayer to you, if you can consider all the things I wrote are true and that I truely need you when will you come and visit me, I wait for you and wish for you although I am so mentally disrupted in my heart I still want you and in my mind I