JosephAngels, we are reminded of the words of the Apostle Paul, "I know how to be humbled, and I know also how to abound. In everything and in all things have I learned the secret both to be filled and to be hungry, both to abound and to be in need. I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." (Philippians 4:12-13 WEB).
Firstly, we must address the fact that your request does not mention the name of Jesus Christ. It is only by His name that we have access to God. As Scripture tells us, "For there is one God, and one mediator between God and men, the man Christ Jesus" (1 Timothy 2:5 WEB). Therefore, we pray to God the Father in the name of Jesus Christ. As well it is by the name of Jesus that we are able to be saved. This means stopping our sin and following the guidance of God in his word, the Bible.
We see that you are struggling with feelings of incapability and restriction. Remember, it is not by our own strength but by the power of the Holy Spirit that we are made capable. As the prophet Zechariah said, "'Not by might, nor by power, but by my Spirit,' says Yahweh of Armies" (Zechariah 4:6 WEB). Just as Paul learned to be content in all circumstances, we too must learn to trust God in both our strengths and our weaknesses. In fact, it is in our weakness that God's power is made perfect (2 Corinthians 12:9).
Regarding evangelism it is not harassment that non-believers are reacting to but the truth of being convicted by hearing the good news in the form of the Gospel. It says "For God so loved the world, that He gave His one and only Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish, but have eternal life. (John 3:16 WEB).
As believers, we also know that God is very much aware of and always active in our lives. If we can remain faithful through difficult times this will also be a testament to others, including any foes. In fact there is much encouragement in scripture such as:
"Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort; who comforts us in all our affliction, that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, through the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God." (1 Corinthians 1:3-4 WEB).
In addition to praying for you, we encourage you to remember that even in the hospital, you are not confined by physical limitations but can move freely in the Spirit. Our hearts statement should be "...where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is liberty." (2 Corinthians 3:17 WEB) We are still and should be spiritual warriors bringing the blessing of God into every place we enter and your current situation is no exception.
As God told Samuel when he was seeking a new king, human judgement based on sight cannot disern the truth but "... for Yahweh sees not as man sees, for man looks at the outward appearance, but Yahweh looks at the heart. " (1 Samuel 16:7 WEB) Therefore, our prayer is for your relationship with God to be renewed and strengthened if it is not where it should be. In this regard we must not forget that salvation itself requires obedience, submission and reverence for our wonderful saviour, Jesus and let His banner over us be love.
We pray for you, Joseph, in the name of Jesus Christ, asking for resoration, encouragement, repentance from any sin and a renewed sense of purpose and capability. We ask God to grant you a new perspective on your circumstances and a supernatural ability to minister to others even from the hospital. We pray the enemy will be bound and hindered from your assignment and God will reveal to you the path to victory. We pray for boldness so that the words of Jesus will be spoken: "... Behold, I have given you authority to tread on serpents and scorpions, and over all the power of the enemy, and nothing will in any way hurt you. "
(Mark 16:15-18 WEB) Finally, we also pray for those who are against you. As Jesus said, "But I tell you, love your enemies, bless those who curse you, do good to those who hate you, and pray for those who mistreat you and persecute you" (Matthew 5:44 WEB). We pray that God will open their hearts to the truth of the Gospel and that they will be transformed by His love.
In all things it is only in Jesus that we are free and have any capabilities in the spritual realm. In Jesus' name agreeing "...that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, of those in heaven, those on earth, and those under the earth, and that every tongue should confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father. (Philippians 2:10-11 WEB).