Amberlynn90
Prayer Partner
Please pray for me. For many of years I’ve always felt like I’m never been good enough for anything or anybody.
Never good enough to to do my job correctly. For example, it seems like every day when I come to work I do something wrong with the mindset of doing it right. I always come to work with a positive attitude and ready to get the day started but it always comes down when I start making mistakes I don’t intentionally want to happen. I can be focused but still mess up wither I’m putting too much thought into it or not. This happens at almost every job I’ve had. I know no one is perfect and everybody makes mistakes in life but I seem to make them a lot more.
Never good enough for people to want to talk to me and or be my friend. For example, I can meet new people that my husband knows from work or just people from my work and think I’m having a good conversation with them but get no response to want to talk or hang out again. Let me explain three incidents that have happened to me that make me think if there is something wrong with me. So let me start off by saying my husband is a social butterfly also very funny and I love him for that because he always lights up my day. So we got invited to a wedding that my husband knows the groom. We go and sit with all his friends with their wives and of course he introduces me and everybody says hi. I’m a very insecure and shy person but I always try to hide it as best as I can so I always try to make small talk to whoever is around me. Music is going and everybody is laughing and having a good time. My husband decides to go to the bar with the other guys from the table which leaves me and another wife there. Awkwardly we are just sitting there looking at everyone dance so I ask her if she likes to dance she answers and we laugh. Ok, so in my mind I’m like ok she’s easy to talk to so I ask her what she does for work and she responds that she’s a teacher and the conversation goes for about a minute. Then out of nowhere she gets up and goes to her husband and I’m alone at the table never saw her again that night. I never told my husband how I felt because I try and not dwell on it so much.
Incident number two. I started this job that I’m currently at and got invited with some girls to lunch. Lunch is going great we leave and come back to work. I tell my husband and he tells me that’s good your making friends which made me feel good about myself. After that day they started going to lunch but never extended the invite. How I knew was because one girl did ask if I was going to lunch with them and told her no one told me and she was like oh ok but you can come if you want. I told her no because the person they were riding with was the one that I went to lunch with last time and is the one that arranged the lunch the girl was telling me to go to. Days go by and that same girl who wanted to go to lunch tells me we need to have lunch just the both of us. I accept. We go and talk about her relationships and then starts to tell me that the girls from the first lunch I went with asked what she was doing for lunch and she proceeded to tell them that she was going with me. She then said that she told them they should meet us there and they told her oh never mind we are going to go take a later lunch. Again is something wrong with me.
I also fell like I’m not a good mother or wife to my husband because I feel so sad. If people really wanted to get to know me they would see I love to make people smile. My heart hurts for anybody going through tough time. I just wish people would do the same for me other than my god and supportive husband.
My list can go on and on why I feel like im not good enough. Please pray for me. I would love to fill the pieces of darkness inside with light.
Never good enough to to do my job correctly. For example, it seems like every day when I come to work I do something wrong with the mindset of doing it right. I always come to work with a positive attitude and ready to get the day started but it always comes down when I start making mistakes I don’t intentionally want to happen. I can be focused but still mess up wither I’m putting too much thought into it or not. This happens at almost every job I’ve had. I know no one is perfect and everybody makes mistakes in life but I seem to make them a lot more.
Never good enough for people to want to talk to me and or be my friend. For example, I can meet new people that my husband knows from work or just people from my work and think I’m having a good conversation with them but get no response to want to talk or hang out again. Let me explain three incidents that have happened to me that make me think if there is something wrong with me. So let me start off by saying my husband is a social butterfly also very funny and I love him for that because he always lights up my day. So we got invited to a wedding that my husband knows the groom. We go and sit with all his friends with their wives and of course he introduces me and everybody says hi. I’m a very insecure and shy person but I always try to hide it as best as I can so I always try to make small talk to whoever is around me. Music is going and everybody is laughing and having a good time. My husband decides to go to the bar with the other guys from the table which leaves me and another wife there. Awkwardly we are just sitting there looking at everyone dance so I ask her if she likes to dance she answers and we laugh. Ok, so in my mind I’m like ok she’s easy to talk to so I ask her what she does for work and she responds that she’s a teacher and the conversation goes for about a minute. Then out of nowhere she gets up and goes to her husband and I’m alone at the table never saw her again that night. I never told my husband how I felt because I try and not dwell on it so much.
Incident number two. I started this job that I’m currently at and got invited with some girls to lunch. Lunch is going great we leave and come back to work. I tell my husband and he tells me that’s good your making friends which made me feel good about myself. After that day they started going to lunch but never extended the invite. How I knew was because one girl did ask if I was going to lunch with them and told her no one told me and she was like oh ok but you can come if you want. I told her no because the person they were riding with was the one that I went to lunch with last time and is the one that arranged the lunch the girl was telling me to go to. Days go by and that same girl who wanted to go to lunch tells me we need to have lunch just the both of us. I accept. We go and talk about her relationships and then starts to tell me that the girls from the first lunch I went with asked what she was doing for lunch and she proceeded to tell them that she was going with me. She then said that she told them they should meet us there and they told her oh never mind we are going to go take a later lunch. Again is something wrong with me.
I also fell like I’m not a good mother or wife to my husband because I feel so sad. If people really wanted to get to know me they would see I love to make people smile. My heart hurts for anybody going through tough time. I just wish people would do the same for me other than my god and supportive husband.
My list can go on and on why I feel like im not good enough. Please pray for me. I would love to fill the pieces of darkness inside with light.
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