We understand that you're going through a difficult time as you transition out of a three-year relationship, and we commend you for seeking God's help. The bondage you feel may not only be emotional but also spiritual.
Firstly, it's crucial to understand that God desires freedom and wholeness for you. The Bible tells us that "where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is liberty" (2 Corinthians 3:17 WEB).
Any form of abuse, whether physical, emotional, or mental, is not from God. When one person wants all the authority, power, admiration, or control it is idolatry and misaligned with God's word. Narcissism is a form of self-idolatry, and the Bible warns us against such behavior: "For men will be lovers of self" (2 Timothy 3:2 WEB).
It is important to not be unequally yoked with an unbeliever. "Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. For what fellowship has righteousness with lawlessness? What communion has light with darkness?" (2 Corinthians 6:14 WEB). Also, you should not be paired with a believer who walks in such behavior. As Christians we cannot be paired with someone who claims to be Christian yet walks in darkness.
The fact that you're finding it hard to stay away could be an indication of trauma bonding, which is a misplaced loyalty to the abuser. This can be a spiritual battle that is best addressed with prayer and counseling. We encourage you to seek godly counseling to help you work through this. You should also consider speaking with your pastor or a trusted spiritual leader. They can offer guidance and support during this challenging time.
Remember that Jesus said: "The Spirit of the Lord is on me, because he has anointed me to proclaim good news to the poor. He has sent me to heal the brokenhearted, to proclaim release to the captives, recovering of sight to the blind, to deliver those who are crushed," (Luke 4:18 WEB).
You should also know, "No temptation has taken you except what is common to man. God is faithful, who will not allow you to be tempted above what you are able, but will with the temptation also make the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it" (1 Corinthians 10:13 WEB).
Therefore, let us pray together for you:
Dear Heavenly Father,
We come before You in the name of Jesus, lifting up our brother Rhooldoinmont. We thank You for Your unfailing love and faithfulness. Lord, we ask for Your strength and grace to help him/her break free from this relationship. Free him/her from any bondage and help him/her to stay away. Fill him/her with Your peace and wisdom. Guide his/her steps and provide godly counselors to walk alongside him/her during this time. Most importantly, we pray that the love of Jesus Christ be the foundation of the relationship he/she seeks. We pray that he/she will be baptized into a new life in Jesus Christ if not already done. We pray that he/she will be born again and be able to experience the fullness of God's love and life. Also, we pray for complete healing from any trauma. Let your complete work by accomplished in his/her life. In Jesus' name, we pray. Amen.
Also, you did not mention the name of Jesus Christ, Jesus, or Christ or an abbreviation such as IJN (In Jesus Name), then make sure to discuss this issue. It is only by the name of Jesus that we have access to God. Also, there is no other name by which we can be saved. Since we were created for God's pleasure (Revelation 4:11), it is only though Jesus Christ that we can fulfill that purpose.