We are truly saddened to hear about the struggles you're facing in your marriage. Let's bring this situation before the Lord in prayer and seek His guidance and intervention.
Firstly, we want to remind you of the sacredness of marriage as designed by God. As it is written in Matthew 19:6 WEB:
So that they are no more two, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate.
It's clear that the enemy is attacking your union, but we stand in agreement with you, rebuking the spirit of divorce, adultery, and destruction. We pray that God would have mercy on your spouse and bring conviction upon their heart. We also pray for God's healing and comfort for you during this challenging time.
Regarding the changes in behavior, it's important to approach this situation with love, patience, and understanding. As it is written in Ephesians 4:2 WEB:
with all lowliness and humility, with patience, bearing with one another in love;
However, it's crucial to address the sinful behaviors, such as going to clubs, staying out, partying, taking drugs, and the suspicion of an affair. These actions are not only harmful to your marriage but also displeasing to God. As it is written in Galatians 5:19-21 WEB:
Now the works of the flesh are obvious, which are: adultery, sexual immorality, uncleanness, lustfulness, idolatry, sorcery, hatred, strife, jealousies, outbursts of anger, rivalries, divisions, heresies, envyings, murders, drunkenness, orgies, and things like these; of which I forewarn you, even as I also forewarned you, that those who practice such things will not inherit the Kingdom of God.
Let's pray together:
Heavenly Father, we come before You in the name of Jesus Christ, lifting up this marriage that is under attack. Lord, we pray for Your divine intervention, that You would soften the heart of the spouse who has gone astray. Bring conviction upon them, and draw them back to Yourself and to their marriage covenant. We rebuke the spirit of divorce, adultery, and destruction, and we ask that You would heal and restore this relationship. Help them to navigate the challenges of perimenopause and midlife crises in a way that honors You and their marriage. Guide them into Your truth, remind them of their first love, and strengthen them to walk in Your ways. In Jesus' name, we pray. Amen.
Lastly, we want to encourage you to continue praying fervently for your spouse and your marriage. Seek Godly counsel and surround yourself with a supportive community of believers. Trust in the Lord, and remember that with God, all things are possible. As it is written in Matthew 19:26 WEB:
But Jesus looked at them and said to them, With men this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.
We also want to encourage you to go to the Lord in prayer about this situation by yourself. This will allow you to build a closer relationship to the Lord and see Him work in your life. We can not emphasize the importance of this enough. It is only by the name of Jesus that we can be saved or have access to God. If you are not comfortable praying by yourself, consider a Bible-believing church with a strong prayer ministry. Romans 10:9-10 WEB:
because, if you will confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord, and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. For with the heart, one believes resulting in righteousness; and with the mouth confession is made resulting in salvation.
Prayer Focus: God, Thank You. Thank You for loving me. God, I ask You in Jesus’ name bless me with everything that I stand in need of and everything You want me to have. Bless me to know You in truth, fall in love with You with all my heart, mind, soul, body, and strength and never fall out of love with You. Bless me to have an ever growing closer stronger, more intimate relationship with You. Bless me with the love, desire, strength, and the spirit of obedience to always delight myself in You, seek first Your kingdom, and Your righteousness. Help and strengthen me God to always respect and obey You. Bless me to trust You with all my heart, acknowledge You in all my ways, and lean not to my own understanding. 
