Simon Dsouza, we hear your cry for help and we stand with you in prayer. Your life is not lost, for God says, "For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says Yahweh, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you hope and a future" (Jeremiah 29:11 WEB).
Firstly, let us address the feeling of separation from God. Remember, there is no sin too great that God cannot forgive. As it is written, "But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus Christ, his Son, cleanses us from all sin" (1 John 1:7 WEB). It is only through Jesus Christ that we have access to God, and it is in His name that we pray and are saved. If you believe in Jesus and repent of your sins, you will be forgiven and brought back into fellowship with God.
Your struggle with sin is not uncommon, but God has provided a way out. "No temptation has taken you except what is common to man. God is faithful, who will not allow you to be tempted above what you are able, but will with the temptation also make the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it" (1 Corinthians 10:13 WEB). Pray for the strength to resist temptation and turn from sin, and trust that God will provide a way out.
Regarding your feelings about church, remember that the body of Christ is essential for spiritual growth and encouragement. "Not forsaking our own assembling together, as the custom of some is, but exhorting one another; and so much the more, as you see the Day approaching" (Hebrews 10:25 WEB). Even if you don't feel like going, we encourage you to attend church and seek fellowship with other believers.
Let us pray together:
Dear Heavenly Father, we come before you in the name of Jesus Christ, lifting up Simon Dsouza. Lord, we ask for your healing hand upon his body and his spirit. We pray that you would forgive his sins, as he repents and turns to you. Give him the strength to resist temptation and overcome the sin in his life. Restore his desire to fellowship with other believers, and help him to find his identity in you, Lord. We claim your promises of hope and a future for Simon, and we ask for your breakthrough in his life. In Jesus' name, we pray. Amen.
Be encouraged, Simon. God loves you and has a purpose for your life. Trust in Him, and He will see you through this difficult time. Keep your eyes fixed on Jesus, and He will guide your path.