Berrayll
Disciple of Prayer
my girlfriend is not a texter. Before we were official I thought she wasn’t texting me frequently because we are not girlfriends whilst I didn’t like the lack of texts, I thought it’s alright and something I need to get used to. Well she is my girlfriend now and during our first date as girlfriend she brought up about how one of her friend constantly texts her, sends her voicemails and then calls her about a situation that happened and how she is not a texter and takes 3-5 business days to respond. I took that as a hint cause I did sent her few texts, about my new job and she would take hours to respond back or respond back the next day altogether. It’s really bothering me now, I don’t feel like I am her girlfriend, makes me feel like I don’t mean anything to her and she can easily go a whole week without texting me. I don’t even get a good morning or good night text from her, she only says good night if I say. She is my first ever relationship too but I have had casual relationships who texted me more than we have ever texted I think I just don’t feel like I’m a priority in her life, I don’t expect her to text me 24/7, just even a simple good morning would be acceptable. I have messaged her that I’m thinking about her and hope that she has a good day etc. but I hardly get her texting me. So on Thursday we talked on the phone for the first time ever and she asked me if she could call me and I think she said we could talk the next day on the phone, Friday comes along and she is like I’m going out with friends and that she will call me this weekend , I am like ok no worries have fun, no response. Saturday comes no text, Sunday she texts me and I ask her if she is free to talk, she says let’s talk in one hour. 2 mins before the hour finishes she is like I’m really tired now, can I call you tomorrow. I didn’t respond to her, I felt so disappointed and actually started crying. Is it too much for her to even talk to me for 2 minutes???! It makes me feel bad because she said she is tired and I don’t want to force her to talk to me. She has an active life, fair enough but I’m her girlfriend. I don’t even want to have hope she will call me today. I just feel like I’m her girlfriend only the one day we meet. Never expected my first relationship to be like this. She is great in person though, and is present. I haven’t seen her in a week and it’s been hard. Because of my uni work. How do I tell her I want her to text me more? Should I tell her it hurt me when she blew me off yesterday? Or do I suck it up? I don’t even know, sometimes I wonder if I’ll make it to 1 month with her??? Sometimes I think maybe she waiting for my uni to end, (25th April) and that she will dump me. Cause I think about her every single day. Maybe she doesn’t at all. What do I say if she asks if I was upset yesterday? I don’t know this whole thing made me lose hope that me and her can make it. I don’t know if I will be able to be her girlfriend with this lack of communication when not seeing each other in person…. I had such intense feelings yesterday, cried so much….maybe I was delusional to think I can come out and be with her. She really hurt me yesterday…. I haven’t told her how I felt, I just said it’s fine we can talk tomorrow…. I need to feel connected to her, maybe we are too different, starting to think my life is boring and I’m boring for her. She deserves a partner that is active and adventurous like her….
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Jesus is faithful!
