J
Jessysmith
Guest
My Family and I have just recently started coming to Cross Trails. It is the first Church we have attended in a long while. It is my resposibility to make sure that my wife and children are at least given the opportunity to have a relationship with God, and I have not been the best rolemodel in doing so. My wife has a family bible study every Sunday with me and the kids. She is truly a stronghold in my life. I have a tendecie to slip away from God when times are good and go running back with my tail tucked between my legs when my life starts falling apart all over again. I believe God has called me several times to serve him in a family church. As to what capacity I am not sure. Because I always run the other direction. Here latley the Lord has been very good to me and my family, and I have not given him the proper appreciation and respect for what how he has blessed us, and we are currently going thru a very difficult time. I believe I have heard this called the "Spirit of Brokeness". I believe that my spirit is broken. I have spent so much time relying on myself and my own abilities and taking credit for all the positive things in my life; instead of relying on Gods power and giving him praise for blessing me and my family. I am tired of pulling myself away from God, and am ready to be drawn closer to him. But this time I want it to be for good. No more tug-of-war. I want to be the Godly Man my children will see as a positive active part in their spiritual and physical lives. I want to be the Godly Husband my wife so richly deserves. I am giving myself completly over to God the best I know how, and I am begging that you will pray for me and ask that God gives this habitual sinner the strength and will to be whatever he has planned for me. I am tired of watching my family suffer for bad choices that I have made. I am tired of hearing my children tell me its ok when they are given beans to eat 3 nights in a roll. I am tired of failing God and my family at every cross road. Why I choose the path opposite of what God has planned for me, I do not know, but its time I want to follow the path he has chosen for me and rely on him to direct my feet as I continue to draw closer to him.