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Ognrack

Disciple of Prayer
May God bless all of you and give you grace and peace.

This is just a summary. God knows the whole story. For years now I have been struggling with not thinking on God's name in vain, any of His names, after hearing it used that way around me. I hated it before and I used to just ignore it. I hate it and it bothers me now and I ask others to stop at times. The thoughts make me angry or sad. I do not want to think of God in that manner nor Jesus Christ. But being around it so often has made me very depressed. As well as other crude humor, which I personally had repented of and try to resist now as well as lust. I have tried to reject the thoughts or take them captive to obey Christ but sometimes it is overwhelming and fear can set in. I left my job because those around me kept joking inappropriately and it just became too much and I couldn't think to do my own work. And I got off anti-depressants which I was advised to get on by church pastor, because the medication caused deeper depression and nightmares (where I couldn't wake up) and suicidal thoughts and caused me to give over to anger (lose control). This has caused my church leaders to walk away from me and my wife separated from me and I was asked to leave my house, which left me feeling broken-hearted and angry and confused as I didn't want to leave the church or my wife (and 3 children 4 and under at the time) and was trying to stay.

I was made to get back on medication, which I didn't want to be on or I wasn't able to be in church because I was rejecting the leadership of the church. Jesus never instructed us to be on medication though and this caused me conflict internally. I was trusting in Jesus and praying as I made decisions. They were also having us read other CS Lewis books which confused me more. Using them for teaching. But the church leadership was confusing me with what they were instructing me to do because it wasn't coming from Scripture (God's Word) or Christ's teachings or the apostles' teachings. I seemed more like CS Lewis or Tolkien (Lord of the Rings) than Christ's teachings. Christ is the head of the church.

At another church now.

I wasn't intentionally trying to sin and wrong anyone. I love God and Jesus that is why it bothers me so much. It's just hard to be around certain sins now. I can only be around it so much before I have to leave and don't want the kids around it. And our families think I am just avoiding them. When really I do not want to be around certain sins.

But I am reaching out because I feel like my prayers are weak and are being hindered (because of my wife and I are arguing because I asked her to stop reading certain books with other gods to the kids). I have been trying to teach our kids about Jesus Christ and the One True God from the gospels and Bible. And trying to train them to be peaceful and loving with one another.

I have been crying out to God for mercy and help because my brain hurts so bad (having headaches every day), and I feel so low in spirit (energy) because of it. I have repented of what sins I know I have committed. But I need his healing and comfort and mercy. To fill me with His Spirit and guide me in His truth. I have struggled to work for about a year now (on a certain project that I have), I try to do small tasks, or jobs that are more manual labor versus heavy thinking because my mind feels overwhelmed. My wife has separated from me multiple times now, since the church leaders advised her to the first time. I am trying but mentally exhausted. I love my wife and family and wanted to keep it together.

And it has caused great distress in me. I just wanted to listen to Jesus Christ's voice (in his gospels) and his teachings and about the Kingdom of God.

Please pray for me. For I believe the prayers of the righteous (the faithful) are heard. I need restoration and guidance (if I should go to a doctor or just bear the pain as I wait on the Lord). I am weak and need Christ's strength. I need His divine intervention after what has happened.
 
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Dear Heavenly Father,

We come before you in the name of Jesus, seeking your grace and peace for ###. We thank you for your love and faithfulness, and we ask that you bless ### with your presence and guidance during this challenging time.

Lord, we lift up ###'s struggle with thoughts of taking your name in vain. We pray that you would help ### to resist these thoughts and to focus on honoring and revering your name. Your Word reminds us in Exodus 20:7, "You shall not take the name of the Lord your God in vain, for the Lord will not hold him guiltless who takes his name in vain." We ask for your strength and protection, that ### may find peace and freedom from these intrusive thoughts.

Father, we also pray for ###'s battle against crude humor, lust, and other temptations. We ask that you would grant ### the power to resist these temptations and to walk in purity and righteousness. Your Word encourages us in James 4:7, "Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you." May ### find strength in you to overcome these struggles and experience victory in Christ.

Lord, we lift up the difficult circumstances that ### has faced, including leaving their job and the challenges with medication. We pray for healing and restoration in their relationships, especially with their wife and children. We ask for your wisdom and guidance in navigating these situations, that ### may experience reconciliation and unity.

Father, we pray for clarity and discernment for ### regarding the teachings and instructions they have received from church leaders. May your Holy Spirit guide them in understanding your Word and discerning truth from any confusion. Your Word reminds us in 1 John 4:1, "Beloved, do not believe every spirit, but test the spirits to see whether they are from God." Grant ### wisdom and discernment to align their beliefs and actions with your truth.

Lord, we ask for your comfort and peace to surround ### during this time of brokenness, anger, and confusion. Your Word assures us in Psalm 34:18, "The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit." May ### experience your presence and find solace in you.

In Jesus' name, we pray for your blessings, grace, and peace to be upon ###. May they find strength, healing, and restoration in you. Amen.
 
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Thank you for giving us the privilege to pray on your behalf. We are glad that that you asked us to stand in agreement with you in prayer. If your request was answered, please post a praise report and let us all know. If your request does not seem to have been answered, please post it again as a new request and allow us to continue with you in prayer. We all hope that our prayers are answered in the way that we want. Sometimes we believe that God is not answering our prayers because we do not see what we expect. In these cases, we should persist in prayer and determine how God is answering our prayer. May God bless you as you continue to seek him through his son, Jesus Christ.
 
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