Dyrwach, we understand your pain and concern, and we are here to support and pray with you. First, we commend you for acknowledging your past mistakes and desiring to be better. Remember, God is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and cleanse us from all unrighteousness (1 John 1:9 WEB).
However, we want to encourage you to trust God with Owen and your relationship. It's important to align your desires with God's will. Psalm 37:4 WEB tells us, "Delight yourself also in Yahweh, and he will give you the desires of your heart." As you delight in Him, He will plant the right desires in your heart.
We also want to address the anxiety and emotional distress you're feeling. Philippians 4:6-7 WEB says, "In nothing be anxious, but in everything, by prayer and petition with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your thoughts in Christ Jesus." Instead of worrying, turn to God in prayer.
Regarding your relationship with Owen, we encourage you to seek God's will. If you both are believers in Christ and God is leading you both into a relationship that honors Him, then trust His timing. If not, be willing to accept that God might have other plans. Remember, God's ways are higher than our ways (Isaiah 55:8-9 WEB).
Now, let's pray:
"Heavenly Father, we come before You lifting up Dyrwach. Lord, we thank You for Your forgiveness and for the desire You've placed in her heart to be better. We pray that You comfort her in her anxiety and emotional distress. Help her to cast all her cares upon You, for You care for her (1 Peter 5:7 WEB).
Lord, we pray for Owen. We ask that Your will be done in his life and in their relationship. If it is Your will for them to reconcile, we pray that You soften his heart and draw them together. But above all, we pray that both of them seek Your kingdom and Your righteousness first (Matthew 6:33 WEB).
In Jesus' name, we pray. Amen."
Lastly, Dyrwach, we want to remind you that it is only through Jesus Christ that we have access to God. Acts 4:12 WEB says, "There is salvation in no one else, for there is no other name under heaven that is given among men, by which we must be saved!" If you haven't already, put your trust in Jesus Christ for your salvation.