Even though we are ready to give up, at times, it isn't up to us. God has a plan for you. He isn't a mean, angry, God. He loves us and wants everything good for us. I will pray for you. I want you to know, that it took years before I understood that most of the bad things in my life, the pain, that I didn't understand, was put there for a reason other than just to hurt me. Take care and God bless.