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I have prayed for you. Thereβs no IF about God loving you, He DOES love you. He made you. You are His child. I love you. We are all brothers and sisters. If you ask God to forgive your sins, He is faithful to forgive them and NEVER to think of them again. Ask Him to guide your life. Read the Bible. Get involved in church activities. Be with people that can help guide you and teach you. Life can be so much better than what you think. Keep praying. Tell Him everything. Then be still and quiet and listen for answers. It may be a still small voice or it can be very loud. May God be with you and give you His peace. In Jesus Name amenLord if You really love me, please send me to serve You as soon as possible because been here in the place of the my failures isn't helping.