Anonymous
Beloved of All
LORD, here is a simple prayer from my heart. I’ve always heard, God, that we can talk to you just like we talk to a friend, because indeed you ARE our Friend. And you understand our language and communication even when we come to You MINUS fancy language or fancy religious sounding prayers. So today dear LORD, what’s on my heart is this: I’m trying to find “who I am” in the world and in the body of Christ. I’ve been searching this out for decades. In so many ways I don’t fit into the mold, and I CAN’T HELP IT!! I’m a “misfit” in the church in general. I’ve tried and tried and tried to fit in, dear LORD. But I noticed one thing about myself, and especially this summer. I seem to have a knack or a gift for making people smile, especially when I do my looney toons voices. It’s obviously a talent you’ve given me, along with my magic tricks. And I love to see others smile and laugh. It’s so needed in today’s world, although it seems so SMALL of a thing as far as making an eternal impact on souls. Nevertheless, I’m real good at it. Even with strangers in public. People mistake me for the late Mel Blanc. But I’m not sure if it’s biblically based as far as sharing the gospel. But it’s what I do naturally, even when my own heart is breaking inside. When Jm hurting deeply, when the clown’s heart is breaking, he can still lighten the burden of other hurting people. Now LORD, my eyes are wet as I type and talk to you Jesus from the heart. I pray in your name my prayer reaches the Father. I want my prayer to reach the Father’s throne through You, Jesus. Jesus, is this my purpose in life??? Is my purpose simply to bring smiles to other’s faces, including children as well as grown ups?? Dear precious LORD, please GUIDE ME!!! I feel so lost and helpless to find my way or to arrive at the truth. I can find no real teaching on this subject! I so BADLY need a revelation from your golden throne!! I have tried and tried and tried for literally DECADES!! Jesus, I’m not getting chronologically any younger, but I believe you can renew my youth. However as a grandpa, as a man who has lived some decades, those chronological years of my life, working in sweaty factories putting shoes on my babies feet before my Diana passed away are years I can never get back. With the remaining years I have left on earth I desire to make every one COUNT!! I feel so LONELY, O LORD, I feel so all alone for I am simply not like others. I’ve been different since the time I was a little boy, where I never fit in, in school, and where I was mocked and teased and laughed at and made fun of and beat up by bullies who SENSED that I was different! I desire to find a purpose for which I was BORN! I desire to find my DESTINY O LORD!! Jesus why did you create ME?? What was my purpose from the womb?? Oh Jesus!! I’m crying out to you with ALL MY HEART!! You have created my very DNA, my SUBSTANCE, and surely you knew me from the womb!! You are my maker! So I pray to you and talk to you now as a friend in this my common colloquial language of just pouring out my heart!! JUST AS I AM, without one plea, but that thy blood was shed for me!! Jesus I know that there are millions who need a smile in the dreary world in which we find ourselves these days. It’s a world filled with evil and darkness. I seek to be a light even if my light is the simplicity of making another soul smile in passing. LORD, please use me, if You can, and if that’s mainly what I was created to do, to cheer others up and bring some sunshine into their day. If that’s the extent of my purpose in the Kingdom then let me sense peace and shalom, and contentment even if greatness is not in the scrolls for me. O LORD, I can not do beyond my knowledge. I can only do what I know, and my understanding is so TINY in this universe! I don’t know how else to express it, but I’m praying to you that I can have some eternal impact on strangers that I meet. I pray my life will count. I pray I will leave some deep footprints in the sands of time. I pray I will leave a LEGACY that my sons and daughter and grandchildren will remember pawpaw, and never forget my memory, the same way we are remembering my mom now since her recent passing. Until you reveal to me otherwise, dear LORD, it’s all this old grandpa has to offer. LORD, hear this prayer spoken to you from the bottom of my heart, from the deepest recesses of my being, with tears burning my eyes and on my face in Jesus’ name! Please send a revelation into my life and a confirmation that it’s all right and that all will be well. My heart is breaking and my heart is crying out to you, dear Jesus. Please let me to know the comfort of your nail scarred hand as I walk through this time now after mom’s passing where I can hopeful find my path now that everything has dramatically changed since her passing and I must find a new path and purpose, as I am no longer her full time care taker and a void has been left by her passing that must be filled. Show me O God who I am. Show me my purpose. Show me how to be a blessing. Show me that You accept me just as I am, a diamond in the rough. Show me what to do, O precious LORD!!