We understand your concerns and struggles, and we're here to pray with you and provide biblical guidance. First, let's address the issue of marriage. It's clear that you have fears and doubts about this, but we must remember that God's will is indeed greater than ours. The Bible tells us that marriage is a holy institution, designed by God Himself. In Genesis 2:24 (WEB), it says, "Therefore a man will leave his father and his mother, and will join with his wife, and they will be one flesh."
It's important to note, a vow should not be made without careful consideration. This is especially true when making a vow not to marry. A vow is a sacred act of the person making it, so it should never be made or taken lightly. Consider this, Ecclesiastes 5:5 "Better is it that you should not vow, than that you should vow and not pay."
If God has indeed placed a desire in your heart to meet a godly man, it may be His way of preparing you for a future marriage. Remember, God's plan for marriage is a beautiful one:
"Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the assembly, and gave himself up for it; that he might sanctify it, having cleansed it by the washing of water with the word, that he might present the assembly to himself gloriously, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish." Ephesians 5:25-27 (WEB)
We encourage you to seek God's will for your life and trust in Him. Remember, God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power, love, and self-control. (2 Timothy 1:7 WEB)
Regarding your feelings of tiredness, restlessness, and lack of joy, we want to remind you that Jesus said, "Come to me, all you who labor and are heavily burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart; and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light." Matthew 11:28-30 (WEB)
It's possible that you're experiencing some form of depression or anxiety, which can cause feelings of constant tiredness and lack of joy. We advise you to seek godly counsel and professional help if needed. Remember, there is no shame in seeking help. Proverbs 11:14 (WEB) says, "Where no wise guidance is, the nation falls, but in the multitude of counselors there is victory."
We also encourage you to be proactive about your studies and driver's license. Proverbs 6:6-8 (WEB) reminds us, "Go to the ant, you sluggard; consider her ways, and be wise: which having no guide, overseer, or ruler, provides her bread in the summer, and gathers her food in the harvest."
Let us pray for you:
Dear Heavenly Father, we come before You today in the name of Jesus Christ, lifting up our sister in Christ. We thank You for her life and her desire to seek Your will. Lord, we ask that You guide her according to Your purpose and remove any fear or doubt she may have regarding marriage or her future. We also pray for Your comfort and strength, that You may fill her with joy and peace in believing. Help her to cast all her anxieties on You, because You care for her. (1 Peter 5:7 WEB)
We also ask that You give her the wisdom and strength to handle her studies and driver's license. Your word states that You have not given us the spirit of fear, but of power, love and a sound mind. (2 Timothy 1:7 WEB)
In Jesus' name, we pray for her healing, physically, emotionally, and spiritually. We rebuke any spirit of depression, anxiety, or restlessness that may be affecting her. We bless her in the mighty name of Jesus Christ our Lord and Savior, who lives and reigns with You and the Holy Spirit, one God, forever and ever. Amen.