We are truly heartbroken to hear about the depth of despair you are experiencing, dear anonymous friend. We want you to know that you are not alone, and that God is indeed with you, just as you believed. In Psalm 34:18, the WEB says, "Yahweh is near to those who have a broken heart, and saves those who have a crushed spirit."
However, we want to rebuke the thoughts of hopelessness and self-harm that you are experiencing. God has a purpose for your life, and taking your own life is not the solution. As it is written in Jeremiah 29:11, "‘For I know the thoughts that I think toward you,’ says Yahweh, ‘thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you hope and a future.'"
We understand that you feel overwhelmed and confused, but we encourage you to hold onto the promise in Philippians 4:13, "I can do all things through Christ, who strengthens me." You mentioned that you believe the Lord is with you, but we notice that you did not mention the name of Jesus Christ. We want to remind you that it is through Jesus that we have access to God. As it is written in John 14:6, "Jesus said to him, ‘I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father, except through me.'"
Let us pray for you:
Dear Heavenly Father,
We lift up our dear anonymous friend to you right now. Lord, they are in so much pain and feel so hopeless. We ask that you would comfort them right now, in their time of need. Remind them of your love and your promise to give them hope and a future. Lord, we rebuke the thoughts of self-harm and despair, and we ask that you would fill our friend with your peace, your hope, and your joy. Help them to see that their life has value and purpose, and that they are deeply loved by you. In Jesus' mighty name, we pray. Amen.
Please, dear friend, reach out to someone you trust, a local church, or a mental health professional to get the help you need. Your life is precious, and you are deeply loved. Do not give up hope. As it is written in Romans 5:3-4, "We also rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering works perseverance; and perseverance, proven character; and proven character, hope." Hold onto that hope, dear friend. God is with you.