Shathesca
Humble Servant
I awoke from a disturbing dream this morning. It felt bothersome. I wondered why it would come from my spirit. Then I sensed God used it to get my attention. I went into prayer and asked Jesus to show me the truth. This is what I heard. " You asked me for salvation for your friend Allie. You ask for help and protection for your friend. I told you that I would have her in my heart. But she has turned away from God. She wants to be in control. But she's not thinking clearly. She is listening to her ego. She is agreeing with deception and temptation to false prophets. This has made things difficult and treacherous for her and all things around her. By abandoning you and Me and all that has been provided for her she has turned in the wrong direction. She called up the opposite side of spiritual faith. This is from the thoughts and dark forces and influences of drugs and evil immoral people and inappropriate things on the internet etc. Pain from grief and disappointment caused her to reject God out of fear she would have to submit to authority. Fear of death and the past consequences lead her to be angry at God. This gave the enemy a chance for him to be in control. Now the only way to get her attention is to make her aware of what deception attracted to her. The ego resides in the illusion of the world. That material things have meaning. So we must loose our illusion to gain our reality. Without God nothing is really possible. To gain salvation she will reach out to you and Jesus to ask for help and support and forgiveness in her moment of sudden realization. This will come in a moment of great losses and fines and sadness and being humbled. She will be protected from harm but she'll lose what she thought was real." That was a prophecy in my dream and it's interpretation last night. So here is where it started. 6 months ago I left her because she was not the person I knew for the past12 years. Drug use and something pervasive had taken her sweet spirit. I prayed and told her I wanted to build our new home in the name of the Lord. She became enraged and her personality seemed like someone else was doing the talking for her. I don't believe in speaking about the enemy but it was very disturbing to watch her self destruction. So I felt a voice inside me say "Get Out!" For 5 weeks I lived in my truck. No money for much food or anything but I expected her to call. Then my mom died and I had no one to talk to. I finally found a job and a room through a charity. God has provided and protected me but I couldn't figure out why she didn't respond to me. This has been very confusing. Then I found out her truck blew up and my horse died and other similar strange things. I ran into her one night at the gas station and was so hopeful but she was mentally not there for any reconciliation or kindness. I tried everything to make peace but she wasn't interested. She ridiculed my faith in God. It was very difficult to witness. Afterwards I was very upset and depressed in my prayers not being answered. But then it occurred to me my faith didn't fail me, it rescued me. Yes this is not the way I planned it but God got me out of a dangerous place. I'm safe and sober and alert and still in my walk with Jesus Christ. I believe God saved me from narcissistic abuse and the pain of destruction to eventually become the one who can save her. But not by running right to her but praying for her daily and constantly on her life with Jesus saving her. Yes I lost my home my partner and friends and my dogs and my best horse but I didn't get lost in my faith. I believe God will deliver her. I believe God is working in her heart. But she will have to lose it all to gain Salvation. Maybe she is "testing" God instead of the other way around. We both have been through losses but I found that God will answer your questions and restore your life when you show him your faith. My Prayer is that all Is Going To Work Out Well and For the Highest Good. That Allie is feeling Jesus in her life right at this very moment. We both shared a walk with Jesus for years. Then she had a hard time after her father died. She grew angry and she started complaining that I was like her father. It made no sense. I tried to explain I wanted to honor his memory but she was already self medicating with massive amounts of Marijuana night and day. She withdrew from everything including her faith. I believe in miracles. I believe in God big time. I believe that wounds sometimes heal best when you keep them clean and leave them alone. I trust that the blood of Jesus Christ is cleansing her now. I believe that she will heal and recover from this curse of addiction and negative things. I am holding space for in faith and love. All of this is going to get better. Everything is going to work out! In Jesus name amen. RL