cesar00
Banned
My Lord, this morning things have started on the wrong foot completely. My wife overslept and Victoria was late to school, all this because my sister in law came to visit last night at ten pm and who knows how late she was here. She is divorced and believes she can do whatever she wants to do whenever she wants to do it. We had a fight this morning because of why Victoria was late, we had a fight yesterday for another reason, every day we are fighting and arguing about things, Lord I do not have the patience nor the energy to deal with this. I have a hard enough time dealing with this patience issue and the anger explotions to have to deal with this at home too. My wife refuses to accept her guilt in certain situations and insists that I am to blame. Okay, I have taken the blame one time, two times, many times but Lord I am not resposible for the dog pissing on the stairs or traffic or the paper being late. My Lord as you are my witness for many years I have been blamed for many different things in our home, I have taken it Lord, I have accepted this blame knowing that it is not mine. Today, My Lord I am tired, I am lonely and have no one to speak with, but you. I go out to the gas station and sit there for a long time chatting with the attendant, I go to the drug store and talk with the attendant there, I am alone Lord, all I have is You, and You are not speaking to me either.
Last night Victoria and I went swimming, I got to exercise and relieve some stress, I got to spend some quality time with her, Thank you Jesus but this is not enough, things are not going the right way at home. I used to wish I was home all day, I enjoyed staying at home and helping my wife with the chores and taking care of our home, now it is not a home anymore, it is just a house. Six people living in a house, no communication, no sharing, each one in his own room, in his own world coming out only when it is necessary to talk about something or get something from another. I was not brought up like this Lord, my family was always close, when we fought my father made us come together and solve our differences. We sat at the dinner table every night and ate together, talked to each other, listened to each other, things in my family have gone completely off the wall. Dear Jesus I am bringing this situation to your cross, I am laying it at your feet Lord. The fact that we are financially broke and that we barely have enough to eat is not an excuse, it is not a reason for each to go his own way, in fact these are reasons for families to come together, to help each other, to grow and mature as one being. Lord this cannot go on any further, something will give, something will snap somewhere and something will happen which will not have remedy. Lord I beg you touch my children, my wife , my heart, Lord bring us close, Lord may your Spirit descend upon all of us and change all the negative attitudes, all the darkness.
Dear Jesus, Cesar and Fernando are smoking weed, they are drinking constantly, Isabella hides behind the television, Vicky, my wife sleeps all day and just lays in bed watching television, it is impossible My Lord for us to get out of the hole we are in, if we have lost all faith and hope in ourselves. My Dear Jesus it hurts me to see them all living for the day, thinking about their petty problems and themselves and leaving out the fact that we are a family and that together we could all feel better. Dear Jesus this is not only a matter of money, although as you know it would do wonders for us, it is a matter of defeat, my chidren are young and strong, healthy and intelligent but they feel defeated, they feel that life has left them behind. There is nothing worst than feeling defeat and being unable to rise to the challenge. I My Lord have been in many., many difficult situations and some way, some how, You have shown me the way out of them, some way you have shown me the way to get out of the dark. Why My Lord Jesus have you left them to fend for themselves, to drown in their own sorrow, in their own tears ??? Why Lord if I am the only one to blame for the disgrace we are living, why do you not extend your hands to them and help them into the light??? Dear Jesus they are wasting their youth in sorrow and depression when they should be happy and planning, dream ing on what they will do tomorrow. My Lord they do not even have a today.....
They all live away from you Lord, this is true, my daughter Victtoria is your only fan, the others, the others probably blame you for the situation we are going thorugh. The others believe I am stupid and dumb relying on you, believing in you, trusting you when we live in complete misery, when their hopes and dreams have been chattered not once but many times. When they looked up to things, to events, to hopes and dreams just to be able to touch them and see them collapse and disapear before thier eyes. Yes My Lord you know that they really have no reason why they should believe in you, why they should thank you. Lord they blame you and me for all their pain and their suffering, for their broken dreams. I can say that I understand them, I do not accept it but I see their point, and probably so do you. Victorita on the other hand loves you with all her little heart, she prays and sings to you all day every day. She has not suffered or gone through what the others have.
I come before you Lord begging for healing, begging for You My Lord Jesus to come to them and touch them. Dear Jesus there are many scars, many resentments, pain and sorrow in their hearts most of them are against me but they do not like You either. Dear Jesus I beg you to take thier hearts and heal them, erase My beautiful Jesus all the memories, all the suffering all the broken dreams, Lord come to them in their dreams and talk to them. Show them the way to your love and salvation. Dear Jesus I do not want them to follow on my path, Dear Jesus ou know that everyone comes to you eventually, Dear Jesus I beg you not to allow them to take the road I took, the long, winding road. Lord I beg you keep them from the suffering and the falls that I have taken before realizing that You are the final goal, the final destination, Dear Jesus if it is your will allow me to carry their crosses, Lord bring them straight to you. My Dear Jesus You know that they have suffered enough, allow them a break, allow all of us a break. Let your light shine thorugh Lord.
My Lord Jesus I stand before you begging for strength, begging for energy, I am exhausted My Lord. I have nowhere to turn and nowhere to go, I have no work and no possibilities in the horizon. My Lord I am tired I am stressed, half the day, my mind and my heart are weakened by the constant prying and the constant attcks of the devil and his followers. Lord I am falling asleep during prayer, I am looking at women's asses in the middle of service, Lord I am screaming at people in the street. Jesus I am exhausted, I do not know anymore what to do. I am not sure if my faith is growing or dying, I do not know where I am going, I do not know where I am leading this family too. Lord this morning you have pointed me to the fact that everything is upside down in this house, My Lord I do not know how to fix it, can you help me?? Can you show me how??? Can You my Lord speak to me and show me the way to You?? Lord there is nothing I can do, I am exhausted and my mind is blank, I lay all this at your feet. My Lord, I can do nothing more, it is up to you to raise it from the darkness or to let it sink completely, I DECLARE MYSELF COMPLETELY HELPLESS !!!!!
Lord there are times when I think about running away and leaving everything behind. Many times I have thought about just walking away, not looking back. Just quitting Lord, many times lately I feel the weight is too much, I feel that I am at a stand still while the world revolves around me, I feel Lord my prayers are useless, they are unheard and they repeat themselves over and over again without purpose and meaning. I need to know My Dear Jesus if it is I doing something wrong, is there something you need from me that I cannot understand or I cannot do. My Lord you know I will do anything to serve you, to prove to you how much I love you and I would do whatever you asked for if you would allow me to carry my children's crosses,their pains and their sorrows. My Lord Jesus I have lived in hell, I have been to hell and talked to the devil, I am not afraid of him or anything else. I love and fear You, My Lord. I do not fear you because you will punish me, NO LORD; I am afraid to offend you, I am afraid to go against you and your word, You are the center of my life Lord, the center of my being and my family, Dear Jesus I beg you stop their pain, open their hearts to hope and to happiness again. Lord they were so beautiful kids who loved you and loved me too, they were once in love with their dreams and the possibilities the world had for them. today they are shadows in the darkness. I beg you Lord Change this, touch them and let your light shine through.
With regards to my wife and I Lord, I beg you to mopen the doors too, Lord touch our hearts and erase all the pain and resentment, allow her to forgive me like you have done, like I myself have done. Dear Jesus erase all the sorrow so she may believe in me once more. We have been through drought and flood, our marriage will survive because it is blessed by you but what is marriage when there are barriers separating us, barriers enclosing us. Drop those walls Lord, open our hearts and let them heal and let them beat as one with YOURS. Thank you Jesus for your time and your love, I know that things will be okay, when this will happen, only you know it. I trust My Lord that you know what is best. Dear Jesus I stand before you with Victoria, Cesar, Fernando, Isabella and Victoria, DEAR JESUS COVER THEM WITH YOUR HOLY BLOOD, CHANGE THEM, HEAL THEM, TOUCH THEM, THEY ARE ALL YOURS LORD, I PLACE THEM AT YOUR FEET FOR YOU TO DO YOUR WILL WITH THEM AND WITH ME. Thank you Jesus in you we trust.
Last night Victoria and I went swimming, I got to exercise and relieve some stress, I got to spend some quality time with her, Thank you Jesus but this is not enough, things are not going the right way at home. I used to wish I was home all day, I enjoyed staying at home and helping my wife with the chores and taking care of our home, now it is not a home anymore, it is just a house. Six people living in a house, no communication, no sharing, each one in his own room, in his own world coming out only when it is necessary to talk about something or get something from another. I was not brought up like this Lord, my family was always close, when we fought my father made us come together and solve our differences. We sat at the dinner table every night and ate together, talked to each other, listened to each other, things in my family have gone completely off the wall. Dear Jesus I am bringing this situation to your cross, I am laying it at your feet Lord. The fact that we are financially broke and that we barely have enough to eat is not an excuse, it is not a reason for each to go his own way, in fact these are reasons for families to come together, to help each other, to grow and mature as one being. Lord this cannot go on any further, something will give, something will snap somewhere and something will happen which will not have remedy. Lord I beg you touch my children, my wife , my heart, Lord bring us close, Lord may your Spirit descend upon all of us and change all the negative attitudes, all the darkness.
Dear Jesus, Cesar and Fernando are smoking weed, they are drinking constantly, Isabella hides behind the television, Vicky, my wife sleeps all day and just lays in bed watching television, it is impossible My Lord for us to get out of the hole we are in, if we have lost all faith and hope in ourselves. My Dear Jesus it hurts me to see them all living for the day, thinking about their petty problems and themselves and leaving out the fact that we are a family and that together we could all feel better. Dear Jesus this is not only a matter of money, although as you know it would do wonders for us, it is a matter of defeat, my chidren are young and strong, healthy and intelligent but they feel defeated, they feel that life has left them behind. There is nothing worst than feeling defeat and being unable to rise to the challenge. I My Lord have been in many., many difficult situations and some way, some how, You have shown me the way out of them, some way you have shown me the way to get out of the dark. Why My Lord Jesus have you left them to fend for themselves, to drown in their own sorrow, in their own tears ??? Why Lord if I am the only one to blame for the disgrace we are living, why do you not extend your hands to them and help them into the light??? Dear Jesus they are wasting their youth in sorrow and depression when they should be happy and planning, dream ing on what they will do tomorrow. My Lord they do not even have a today.....
They all live away from you Lord, this is true, my daughter Victtoria is your only fan, the others, the others probably blame you for the situation we are going thorugh. The others believe I am stupid and dumb relying on you, believing in you, trusting you when we live in complete misery, when their hopes and dreams have been chattered not once but many times. When they looked up to things, to events, to hopes and dreams just to be able to touch them and see them collapse and disapear before thier eyes. Yes My Lord you know that they really have no reason why they should believe in you, why they should thank you. Lord they blame you and me for all their pain and their suffering, for their broken dreams. I can say that I understand them, I do not accept it but I see their point, and probably so do you. Victorita on the other hand loves you with all her little heart, she prays and sings to you all day every day. She has not suffered or gone through what the others have.
I come before you Lord begging for healing, begging for You My Lord Jesus to come to them and touch them. Dear Jesus there are many scars, many resentments, pain and sorrow in their hearts most of them are against me but they do not like You either. Dear Jesus I beg you to take thier hearts and heal them, erase My beautiful Jesus all the memories, all the suffering all the broken dreams, Lord come to them in their dreams and talk to them. Show them the way to your love and salvation. Dear Jesus I do not want them to follow on my path, Dear Jesus ou know that everyone comes to you eventually, Dear Jesus I beg you not to allow them to take the road I took, the long, winding road. Lord I beg you keep them from the suffering and the falls that I have taken before realizing that You are the final goal, the final destination, Dear Jesus if it is your will allow me to carry their crosses, Lord bring them straight to you. My Dear Jesus You know that they have suffered enough, allow them a break, allow all of us a break. Let your light shine thorugh Lord.
My Lord Jesus I stand before you begging for strength, begging for energy, I am exhausted My Lord. I have nowhere to turn and nowhere to go, I have no work and no possibilities in the horizon. My Lord I am tired I am stressed, half the day, my mind and my heart are weakened by the constant prying and the constant attcks of the devil and his followers. Lord I am falling asleep during prayer, I am looking at women's asses in the middle of service, Lord I am screaming at people in the street. Jesus I am exhausted, I do not know anymore what to do. I am not sure if my faith is growing or dying, I do not know where I am going, I do not know where I am leading this family too. Lord this morning you have pointed me to the fact that everything is upside down in this house, My Lord I do not know how to fix it, can you help me?? Can you show me how??? Can You my Lord speak to me and show me the way to You?? Lord there is nothing I can do, I am exhausted and my mind is blank, I lay all this at your feet. My Lord, I can do nothing more, it is up to you to raise it from the darkness or to let it sink completely, I DECLARE MYSELF COMPLETELY HELPLESS !!!!!
Lord there are times when I think about running away and leaving everything behind. Many times I have thought about just walking away, not looking back. Just quitting Lord, many times lately I feel the weight is too much, I feel that I am at a stand still while the world revolves around me, I feel Lord my prayers are useless, they are unheard and they repeat themselves over and over again without purpose and meaning. I need to know My Dear Jesus if it is I doing something wrong, is there something you need from me that I cannot understand or I cannot do. My Lord you know I will do anything to serve you, to prove to you how much I love you and I would do whatever you asked for if you would allow me to carry my children's crosses,their pains and their sorrows. My Lord Jesus I have lived in hell, I have been to hell and talked to the devil, I am not afraid of him or anything else. I love and fear You, My Lord. I do not fear you because you will punish me, NO LORD; I am afraid to offend you, I am afraid to go against you and your word, You are the center of my life Lord, the center of my being and my family, Dear Jesus I beg you stop their pain, open their hearts to hope and to happiness again. Lord they were so beautiful kids who loved you and loved me too, they were once in love with their dreams and the possibilities the world had for them. today they are shadows in the darkness. I beg you Lord Change this, touch them and let your light shine through.
With regards to my wife and I Lord, I beg you to mopen the doors too, Lord touch our hearts and erase all the pain and resentment, allow her to forgive me like you have done, like I myself have done. Dear Jesus erase all the sorrow so she may believe in me once more. We have been through drought and flood, our marriage will survive because it is blessed by you but what is marriage when there are barriers separating us, barriers enclosing us. Drop those walls Lord, open our hearts and let them heal and let them beat as one with YOURS. Thank you Jesus for your time and your love, I know that things will be okay, when this will happen, only you know it. I trust My Lord that you know what is best. Dear Jesus I stand before you with Victoria, Cesar, Fernando, Isabella and Victoria, DEAR JESUS COVER THEM WITH YOUR HOLY BLOOD, CHANGE THEM, HEAL THEM, TOUCH THEM, THEY ARE ALL YOURS LORD, I PLACE THEM AT YOUR FEET FOR YOU TO DO YOUR WILL WITH THEM AND WITH ME. Thank you Jesus in you we trust.
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