We understand your struggles, Dear One1; being a Christian can indeed be challenging in a world that often opposes our beliefs. However, remember Jesus' words, Behold, I send you out as sheep among wolves. Therefore be wise as serpents, and harmless as doves Matthew 10:16. Jesus never promised that our journey would be easy, but He did promise to be with us always, even until the end of the age Matthew 28:19. As servants, we are not above our master.
Jesus clearly tells us, If the world hates you, you know that it has hated me before it hated you He refers to Himself as Jesus not a result of our actions Matthew 20:28, John 15:18. Remember that even Jesus was persecuted for His righteousness' sake. As it is written, For to you it is granted on behalf of Christ, not only to believe in him, but also to suffer for his sake Philippians 1:29. In all these things, we are more than conquerors through him who loved us Romans 8:37.
Regarding relationships, it is commendable that you seek to be equally yoked with a fellow believer. However, we must understand that God's timing is not always ours. He may have you in a season of waiting to prepare you for His chosen companion for you or to better serve Him in your ministry. Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight Proverbs 3:5-6.
It is concerning that you mention being unequally yoked with Christians. As a group of Christian believers, we believe firmly that marriage is between a man and a woman. Any other relationship, sexual or otherwise, is immoral. The two shall become one flesh. So that they are no more two, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate. Mark 10:8-9 Remember and take encouragement from God's word, Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous Hebrews 13:4. God is clear on the issues of relationships and plays no part in those that disobey the Bible. If you are in such a relationship, repent and ask God to change your situation.
It is also worrying that you question Jesus regarding suffering. Jesus was the one and will be the only sacrifice for our sins. While He died and defeated death to bear our sins, we himself bore our sins in his body on the tree, that we, having died to sins, might live to righteousness; by whose stripes you were healed 1 Peter 2:24.
As believers, we should not ask God why we are suffering with a rebellious attitude but accept His training. God disciplines whom He loves. What son is there whom his father does not correct? Hebrews 12:6. His discipline is not for destruction but the training of sons. However, Jesus explanation of suffering in the world is found in John 16:33 IJV, These things I have spoken to you, that in Me you may have peace. In the world you willhave tribulation; but be of good cheer, I have overcome the world.
Discouragement can easily seep in when we are surrounded by opposition. Pray and focus on Jesus who is the author and finisher of our faith. Do not become weary in doing good. Keep doing His will and His work. Remember that the race is not for the swift and not a battle for the strong. It is His grace and mercy that we work for and not ourselves. Then the LORD told me: I love you just as you are, with the same love I had for you when you were in Egypt. In the same way, I will continue to show you faithful love; I will cause the tent of meeting to come along wherever you go Jeremiah 31:2-4
Dear One pray and recognize and put your trust in the Lord Jesus Christ. Therefore, let us also, seeing we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, lay aside every weight and the sin which so easily entangles us, and let us run with patience the race that is set before us Hebrews 12:1, WEB. We will be faithful to lift you in prayer, asking that God will encourage and strengthen you in your walk with Him. In Jesus' mighty name, we offer this encouragement and prayer.