Welcome back, Joseph! "Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus" (1 Thess 5:16-18). Trust God's steadfast love. "I am with you always" (Matt 28:20). Keep praising! 
Rayeth
Disciple of Prayer
I’m in need of prayer for healing in my body. I am a mother of 3, and unfortunately have also had 3 abortions. The first one was just a couple months after my second child, I was extremely stressed and the relationship I was in was mentally and verbally abusive. At this time I was astray from God, my partner didn’t even believe in that. The second time was after my third child (I was pregnant within a year from my first abortion) and I realized God was telling me something. I kept my son, he is my baby (6 now). When I had my second abortion I was diving deep into spirituality and faith, not yet Jesus but heavily talking to god in general….i was lead to start saving up and keep evidence to leave my relationship. The Holy Spirit told me that my ex was going to try to get me pregnant on purpose. I refused to have intercourse and didn’t for 6 months, in that time frame my birth control disappeared and I automatically knew he took it..a couple months later, not being consistent in my BC because it was went missing and I really wasn’t active so I didn’t think much of the inconsistency of taking it…I gave in one time, within a few weeks I missed my period and I was pregnant. This was so heavy to me because I was actively talking to god but immediately knew I couldn’t bring a baby into this mess. My ex was abusive towards not only me but my daughter and had a lot of anger he would take out on all the kids . Long story short I had my second abortion, journaled throughout , spoke to god, cried, asked for forgiveness, prayed…. Had to go back because the pill didn’t expel everything and when I went back for a check up I went through a D&C without meds because I had no one to drive me. That forever haunted me and I asked god in my journal for that baby to come back when I was in a healthy and happy relationship. I didn’t know that relationship would come just a few years later, but I fell into another abortion because I was so caught up in trying to get on my feet financially. Throughout my abusive relationship I was financially dependent on him as he wouldn’t allow me to work. I have struggled for years trying to run my own business right at the beginning of the pandemic and have barely kept my head above water. After this last abortion, I felt so empty….during this time I kept hearing “Jesus” everytime I would ask god for an answer, what should I do? I need help, what do I need to do? “Jesus” was always what would pop up. A year later after my last abortion, my business was crashing with my business partner and we decided to part ways. I tell my boyfriend, that I felt like I had the abortion for no reason… that I wish I would have had our baby because obviously it’s not my path to be financially successful. You wouldn’t believe that just one week later, my period is late and I’m pregnant. I cried, thanking god in full acceptance. I promised to never do it again. We were getting excited and telling our families… and just a few weeks later everything crashed when I found out I was miscarrying. Since then I have come back to Jesus, I have gotten into a small group… I’m reading scripture and digging in as much as possible, most importantly I’m talking to Jesus and can really see where he’s talking back and blessing me in my life… I’m back in school and almost ready to apply for an RN program.. but since my miscarriage my periods have been very light and only lasting 2 days maybe? I also have felt conviction on fornication and have spoken with my partner who also is a Christian about how I feel about it. We are not completely abstinent but we rarely are intimate in that way now… he speaks about marriage and I’m hoping it’s soon. I ask for prayers for forgiveness, and for divine healing on my body. I am asking for my hormones to be balanced and my menstrual cycle to be regular. I ask for marriage weigh heavy on my partners heart so we can have a holy covenant in Christ the way he intended for us. I also ask that hopefully when I finish nursing school, we are finally married and will have a beautiful healthy baby please. I know through Christ all things are possible, please pray for me.
