I Need Of Deep Spiritual Healing..

[LadyofGod]

Father how can I get over my anxiety. I have prayed but nothing seems to be working. I don’t know what to do Dad and it is taking over my life. I see now that it is me who has the problems I can’t cope or deal with having a relationship in my life because I’m too afraid to let the other person be and also be myself as well. When r u going to answer my prayers and set me free. I really need your help. You told me so many things last night.. I guess I have been seeking you more because I don’t want to smoke anymore to dull the pain. I want to deal with it and overcome it. I can’t live my life like this anymore how can I put my trust in you when all I receive in this area of my life is pain. I feel as though everyone that I have ever loved has left me. This is a major issue of my life Dad and you’re the only one who understands how I feel and I need your help. I feel sooo sad and helpless. My mod has gone from happy to depressed its so hard to feel like this daily why can’t you help me. Why aren’t you helping me, but I know you are that is why you placed in my heart what the real issues are. So now I know what do I do Lord. How do I gain ground and do what I need to do.

I feel helpless because I have exhausted all efforts of my own in trying to acquire a husband.. See when it was temporary I’m fine I don’t feel the need to get too attached or even think about a future with that person but as soon as I get close the fear starts and the anxiety kicks in and I want to run than be with anyone. If this is your way of me getting help and getting over this then Help Me! I need it now.. I am so tired of feeling this way. I want a healthy relationship with someone … I Have placed my fears in your hands before.. you told me you were separating the light from darkness and you were also going to bring Winn back and you did.. then why am I holding on to these men as though there will be no other??

How can I eventually get over the past feelings and give all to you. It is getting worse dad and I need your help please hear me Please!!!.. I can’t go on like this my life is in terror. Please help Me!!! Is that why this is all happening? First you bring back Robert to show mw there was nothing I can do to make things work between us and that you were in total control. And did you bring back Andre to open me up to face the fears of having a real meaningful relationship. Then why is Jp in my life is he here to take me through the healing process of this inhumane disease. I know I will get the husband once this fear is gone and I have given myself completely over to you.. I need you and I realized that it was not Andre, Jp or Robert but me inside who is just too afraid to let go of the fear. But I want to work on it dad and be whole again. Help me to trust in you I didn’t know the depths of my fears but I see it clearer and clearer. Now the journey part of it is getting healed. And I know jumping to another guy is not going to help me because that’s how I escape but I have to face it dissect it and deal with it. So here I am dealing and coping. So what do I do from here Dad? Which way do I go.. I will put my trust in you and give you all the hurt, pain and disappointment.. whether I end up with JP or not I just want to get over what I am going through so that my next relationship will be anxiety free. Thank you God… Please heal me Amen