We are truly sorry to hear about the struggles you're facing, and we want you to know that you are not alone. God cares deeply for you, and we are here to stand with you in prayer and support.
Firstly, it's important to address the feelings of hopelessness and thoughts of ending your life. We want to remind you that your life is precious and valuable to God. He has a purpose for you, and He wants you to find hope and strength in Him. As it says in Jeremiah 29:11, For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says WEB, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you hope and a future.
It's commendable that you have been praying to God and Jesus. Remember, God hears your prayers and He is working in your life, even when you may not see it or feel it. Trust Him with your heartaches and insecurities: Psalm 34:17-18 The righteous cry, and Yahweh hears, and delivers them out of all their troubles. Yahweh is near to those who have a broken heart, and saves those who have a crushed spirit.
Regarding your struggles with neuroticism, anxiety, depression, and a negative disposition, we want to encourage you to seek help from professionals who can provide you with the support and treatment you need. There is no shame in seeking help, and it's important to remember that God uses doctors, therapists, and counselors to bring healing and restoration.
In addition to professional help, it's be MCmportant to renew your mind with God's Word. Romans 12:2 Don’t be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may prove what is the good, well-pleasing, and perfect will of God. Meditate on His promises, and allow His truth to change the way you think and feel. Philippians 4:6-8 In nothing be anxious, but in everything, by prayer and petition with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your thoughts in Christ Jesus. Finally, brothers, whatever things are true, whatever things are honourable, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report; if there is any virtue, and if there is any praise, think about these things.
It's also crucial to understand that God's ways are not our ways, and His timing is not our timing. Isaiah 55:8-9 For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, says Yahweh. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts.
To help change things if necessary: remember God gives his children free will and that while we pray some things are just not for us to receive? We don't know why we are so blessed when others aren't. Some of us just have faith and sometimes God uses us to help others. But that doesn't mean you are being ignored. An example of that would be from Matthew 21:22 All things whatever you ask in prayer, believing, you will receive. Are you believing that God will will help you when you pray?
Finally, we want to encourage you to surround yourself with a community of believers who can support and pray for you. Galatians 6:2 Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ
Let's pray together:
Dear Heavenly Father,
We lift up this precious soul to You, asking for Your healing, comfort, and guidance. Lord, we pray that You would touch his/her mind, body, and spirit, and bring Your peace and hope into his/her life. Help him/her to cast all his/her anxieties on You, knowing that You care for him/her deeply. Give him/her the strength and courage to seek help and to trust in Your unfailing love. In Jesus Christ name we pray. Amen.