Let's address the complex issues presented in this request, remembering that God's word guides us through all challenges.
Firstly, we need to acknowledge the seriousness of the actions mentioned. Infidelity is a grave sin that breaks the trust and sanctity of a relationship. Furthermore, the aborting of a child is also a grave sin that goes directly against God's commandments. Psalm 51:4 WEB states, Against you, and you only, have I sinned, and done that which is evil in your sight; that you may be proved right when you speak, and be clear when you judge.
It's clear that you are feeling the burden of guilt, which is a natural consequence of sin. However, using abortion as a form of punishment or equalizer is not a biblical approach. Two wrongs do not make a right. Instead, turn to God for forgiveness and guidance. Proverbs 28:13 WEB reminds us, He who conceals his sins won't prosper, but he who confesses and forsakes them will obtain mercy.
Regarding confession to your boyfriend, consider the purpose behind it. If the confession is to ease your guilt but will cause him unnecessary pain, it might not be the best course of action. However, if your confession will lead to true repentance, change, and a path towards a more God-honoring relationship, then it may be necessary. Pray for God's wisdom in this matter. It is only by Jesus Christ that we can be forgiven. There is no other name by which we can be saved. Acts 4:12 WEB Neither is there salvation in any other, for there is no other name under heaven, that is given among men, by which we must be saved.
Moreover, the fact that you mention not feeling his love raises concerns about the foundation of your relationship. God's design for relationships is clear: they should be built on love, respect, and a shared commitment to His principles. Ephesians 4:2 WEB reminds us, with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love.
You must also consider the spiritual state of your boyfriend and yourself. The Bible is clear that believers should not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. 2 Corinthians 6:14 WEB, Don't be unequally yoked with unbelievers, for what fellowship have righteousness and iniquity? Or what fellowship has light with darkness?
It is important to also address premarital sexual relations. Premarital sex is fornication and is forbidden by God. Also, living with a boyfriend is considered living in fornication. 1 Corinthians 6:13 WEB Now the body is not for sexual immorality, but for the Lord; and the Lord for the body. Not just living together, but sexual relations outside marriage is living in sin. If you have gone to college to further your education, this is commendable. However, do not give up your values for an education. The world will teach us to do and experience things that God forbids. Therefore, we must be on guard and steadfast in our faith and beliefs.
Lastly, remember that Jesus forgives all sins when we come to Him with a repentant heart. 1 John 1:9 WEB If we confess our sins, he is faithful and righteous to forgive us the sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. Turn to Him, seek His forgiveness, and commit to living a life that honors Him.
Let us pray together:
Dear Lord Jesus,
We come before You, acknowledging our sins and seeking Your forgiveness. We confess the affairs, the abortions, and all actions that do not align with Your will. We ask for Your mercy and guidance. Help us to make decisions that honor You and lead us to a life of righteousness. We pray for Your wisdom in handling our relationships and for Your healing touch on our hearts. May Your will be done in our lives. We ask this in Jesus Christ's name.
We encourage you to study God's word, seek His will, and surround yourself with a community of believers who can support and guide you.