Anonymous
Beloved of All
I have body dysmorphic disorder. I am fat shamed everyday at the hospital for almost a month of me working there and it's getting to me. I know I'm losing weight, I'm just starting to have a healthier relationship with food, I'm starting to have a healthier relationship with God, but somehow it all comes crashing down again. I literally hate myself so much right now, and I feel debilitated, I don't feel like going to work, I feel so down and depressed and my mom makes it so much worse. She and my dad loves commenting about our bodies as if our bodies should be fixed to be able to earn people's respect. I'm literally so tired. I feel like I'm being tested by the devil right now and it really hurts. What hurts more is that I have no one to share this pain with. It seems like they all think I'm crazy or too much for even feelig this way. What's really interesting is that I probably made a sales attendant lose his job. He made fun of my body while I was browsing through makeup, and I filed a customer complaint on the store's social media. Now I feel so guilty about it, because I wish I could have held my temper and maybe they wouldn't get their jobs hurt, but I couldn't take it anymore. I'm so angry, and hurt and depressed and alone and lonely. I'm questioning again if God is even with me, or not. But, please, if my prayer isn't powerful enough, maybe you can help me pray for me instead.Thanks a lot.