I WILL PRAY FOR YOU. I KNOW EXACTLY HOW YOU FEEL. I HAVE OCD -- PEOPLE THINK THAT MEANS STUFF LIKE COMPULSIVE HANDWASHING, BUT IT CAN BE WAY DIFFERENT THAN THAT, I HAVE SEVERE, SEVERE ANXIETY DISORDER. I AM WHAT THEY CALL BIPOLAR II, WHICH IS A TOTALLY DIFFERENT THING THAN FULL-BLOWN MANIC DEPRESSION. I CYCLE FROM DEPRESSED TO MORE DEPRESSED. I NEVER FEEL GRANDIOSE. I NEVER GO DAYS WITHOUT SLEEP AND THEN JUST CRASH. (FROM WHAT YOU ARE SAYING, I SUSPECT YOU HAVE THE SAME CONDITION AS I DO.) I THINK THE BEST THING YOU CAN DO IS JUST NOT SAY ANYTHING TO ANYBODY ABOUT IT. IF YOU ARE DEPRESSED, YOU ARE DEPRESSED. (I AM THINKING YOU WILL BE HAVING ROOM MATES. I AM NOT SURE BY HOW YOU WROTE THIS.) YOU ARE RIGHT THAT SOME PEOPLE DO NOT LIKE TO BE AROUND PEOPLE WITH MENTAL ILLNESS. BUT SOME DO NOT MIND. AND SOMETIMES IT DEPENDS ON THE TYPE OF RELATIONSHIP -- I TAKE MY MEDICATION AND WORK ON MY PSYCH PROBS BECAUSE I WANT TO BE IN A RELATIONSHIP WITH A MAN AND GET MARRIED. ANYBODY WHO TRULY LOVES ME WILL HAVE TO ACCEPT MY HANDICAP, BUT WHAT I OWE IS TO DO MY BEST NOT TO LET MY ILLNESS DEFINE ME. YOU MUST DO THAT AS WELL. IT SOUNDS TO ME LIKE THAT IS WHAT YOU ARE DOING -- LETTING THE ILLNESS DEFINE YOU. THAT IS PROBABLY THE UNDERLYING REASON THAT YOU ARE SO FEARFUL. I AM PRAYING VERY HARD FOR YOU. RIGHT NOW, I AM EAGERLY AWAITING THE ARRIVAL IN THE MAIL OF MY PRESCRIPTION FOR CYMBALTA. THAT IS A WONDERFUL ANTIDEPRESSANT THAT I HAVE BEEN ON BEFORE. I ALSO TAKE LAMOTROGINE, WHICH TO ME IS A GOD-SEND. IT COMPLETELY CONTROLS RACING THOUGHTS. I AM GRATEFUL TO HAVE AN EXCELLENT THERAPIST WHO JUMPED THROUGH HOOPS TO GET ME THAT CYMBALTA. IF IT MAKES YOU FEEL ANY BETTER, YOU ARE NOT ALONE. I HAVE STRUGGLED WITH ESPECIALLY DEPRESSION MY ENTIRE LIFE. I WISH I HAD BEEN DIAGNOSED AT A MUCH YOUNGER AGE. MY LIFE WOULD PROBABLY HAVE BEEN SO MUCH DIFFERENT. WELL, THIS IS THE CROSS GOD GAVE ME TO CARRY. SOME DAY I WILL KNOW WHY, AND SO WILL YOU. HOPE THIS HELPS. GOD BLESS YOU AND KEEP YOU. I PRAY FOR YOU IN THE NAME OF JESUS OF NAZARETH. YOUR SISTER IN CHRIST, LAMB.
P.S.: IT PROBABLY IS BEST IF YOU DO NOT TALK ABOUT YOUR DEPRESSION, ETC. BUT UNLESS YOU ARE DOING SOMETHING WRONG -- MAKING TROUBLE, DESTROYING THE PLACE, THREATENING PEOPLE OR BEING VIOLENT, ETC., --- I HIGHLY, HIGHLY DOUBT YOU WOULD DO ANYTHING EVEN REMOTELY RESEMBLING STUFF LIKE THAT -- IT WOULD BE TOTALLY ILLEGAL DISCRIMINATION TO EVICT YOU.