seekingmercy
Faithful Servant
I don't know what I did in my life to deserve this kind of punishment. One guy who used me, and he is happy. His parents are happy. My parents and I are miserable. i prayed to you last year, saying thank you, and saying I'm just getting better and I can't get into something if it won't end well, and immediately you had him tell me I love you so much, but my ego is bothering me. And he went on to love me and make me happy till he left the country and decided it's time to move on leaving me to cry and whine. And this is my fault because he didn't lie to me, and I still let myself hope, hope in you, and think that you will make it happen. And my grandma. I prayed to you to keep her safe till I can see her and have her see me, and within 10 mins of me praying she passed away. I walk and climb 3000 steps to come see you and ask you to keep me calm and normal, and I walk out after praying, and you make me find out that my father might be having an affair ruining that for me.. I know what mistake I made in my life and I begged for forgiveness and I begged you to not let it affect my future and to give me happiness. And now when I am finally calm, you bring him into my life across the street, and he is in love with the girl I introduced to him. Why are you so cruel to me. I was becoming calm thinking I'll never have to see him again and I can pretend like he doesn't exist, and I was getting better. But you couldn't let that happen too. Why do you hate me so much? I told my mom, I will come to you only to say thank you, and not to beg you, and that you can do what you want with my life, but you make me come to you to beg you to take my life away. Please please please, take my life away. All these news articles everyday about babies set on fire, girl thrown off a bridge, it's all miserable. Give them a chance at life, and take my life, which I can't appreciate and am scared off away.