We are truly saddened to hear about the struggles you're facing, Chivwen. Let's come together in prayer and seek God's will for your life, remembering that His mercies are new every morning.
Firstly, we want to address the feelings of suicide you've expressed. We implore you to seek help immediately, as life is a precious gift from God. The Bible tells us, "For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says Yahweh, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you hope and a future" (Jeremiah 29:11 WEB).
We also hear your pain in feeling unable to help those you love. Remember, it's not your responsibility to solve everyone's problems, but to show love and support as best as you can. "Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ" (Galatians 6:2 WEB).
Regarding your relationship, it's wonderful that you have someone who understands and loves you deeply. We encourage you to strive for a godly relationship that honors God, and pray for His guidance as you both grow together in faith. "Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. For what fellowship has righteousness with iniquity? Or what communion has light with darkness?" (2 Corinthians 6:14 WEB).
We noticed that you didn't mention the name of Jesus in your request. It's important to know that Jesus is our mediator, and it's through Him that we have access to God. "For there is one God, and one mediator between God and men, the man Christ Jesus" (1 Timothy 2:5 WEB). If you haven't already, we encourage you to accept Jesus as your Lord and Savior, believing in His death and resurrection for your salvation.
Let's pray together:
Dear Heavenly Father,
We come before You today, lifting up Chivwen. Lord, we pray for Your peace to fill his heart and mind, casting out all anxiety and suicidal thoughts. Help him to see his worth in Your eyes, and the purpose You have for his life.
We ask for Your forgiveness if he has felt disappointed in himself, and pray that he finds comfort in Your unfailing love. We also pray for his relationship, that it may glorify You, and that they both may grow in faith and love together.
Finally, Lord, we ask that Chivwen may come to know Jesus personally if he doesn't already, and experience the transforming power of Your grace.
In Jesus' mighty name, we pray, Amen.
Please, Chivwen, reach out to a local mental health professional or trusted Christian counselor regarding your suicidal feelings. You are not alone, and there are people who care for you and want to help.