Elizabeth, we are here with you in spirit and in prayer. First, we want to address your feelings of fear and desperation. We are so glad that you reached out and want you to know that your life is incredibly valuable. It is not by accident that you are here; God has a purpose and a plan for you.
In moments of despair, it can be difficult to hear from God. Prayers may not be answered immediately, but it is not an indication of God's silence or lack of love. God is like a good father who is waiting for His children, but is always listening and God will answer everyone - in His time. Let's remember the words of Jesus in Matthew WEB:
Ask, and it will be given you. Seek, and you will find. Knock, and it will be opened for you. For everyone who asks receives. He who seeks finds. To him who knocks it will be opened. Or who is there among you, who, if his son asks him for bread, will give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, who will give him a serpent? If you then, being evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give good things to those who ask him!
Be assured that suffering is not a sign that God is punishing you. Do not be afraid of the suffering, because even Jesus allowed Himself to suffer in our behalf. Take heart in the words of Peter:
But even if you should suffer for righteousness' sake, you are blessed. Don’t fear what they fear, neither be troubled. But sanctify the Lord God in your hearts; and always be ready to give an answer to everyone who asks you a reason concerning the hope that is in you, with humility and fear: having a good conscience; that, while you are spoken against as evildoers, they may be disappointed who curse your good manner of life in Christ.
Do not be afraid to tell someone about the pain and darkness you are going through and get help. To what you mentioned: I honestly feel like ending it but don’t know how to and am so afraid. This is not God's plan for you. Reach out to someone and call a local help hotline if you do not know who to turn to.
We must not forget that Our hope is in Jesus Christ and that He has a plan and purpose for our lives. Keep on praying, keep on asking, and keep on looking for ways to do good and display God's love.
Let us pray together:
Father God, we come before You, lifting up Elizabeth. We know her life has been difficult and frustrating with both physical and mental concerns. Let Elizabeth feel a deep reassuring peace from the beautiful love that you have for her this day. There is no doubt that you have a plan and purpose for her. Be with her every day, and let Elizabeth see how much you love her. In Jesus' name.
Hi everyone! Let's lift up 
